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Some people believe that to be successful at a sport you need a natural ability and others think that hard work and practice can make you successful. Discuss both views and give your opinion? v.6

Although some individuals think that in order to succeed at a sport one needs to possess an inborn talent, others believe that working hard and regular practice towards a sport can make an individual successful. In my opinion, I think daily dedicated serious practice can help the desired sports person to thrive at a particular sport. On the one hand, some human beings think that natural skills with which an individual is born makes him successful in a particular sport. In other words, some personalities are born talented with certain skills, helping them to learn vivid techniques and play a game with ease; thereby, achieving success. For instance, Sania Nehwal, a well-known badminton star had a natural ability to play the forward stroke which helped her to become the youngest badminton player from India. Thus, having an inborn ability towards a particular game can make a person successful in a specific sport. On the other hand, some people believe that working seriously towards a particular sport and regular practise helps a person to succeed. They point to the fact that every person is born with the same opportunities and it is an individual's commitment and dedication towards the sport that helps one to become a star. For example, Sachin Tendulkar, the worlds top-notch cricketer, practised for two years, 8 hours daily without taking a break for a single day; hence, catalyzing him to master the art of batting. In conclusion, while people may vary in their opinion, I think practising regularly and sincere dedication towards a sport helps a sportsperson to possess various skills and learn different techniques which makes him successful.
Although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that in order to succeed at a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
one needs to possess an inborn talent, others believe that working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
and regular practice towards a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
an individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
. In my opinion, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
daily dedicated serious practice can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
the desired
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
to thrive at a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
particular
sport.

On the one hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
human beings
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that natural
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
with which an individual
is born
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
him
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
particular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
.
In other words
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
personalities
are born
talented with certain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, helping them to learn vivid techniques and play a game with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
; thereby, achieving success.
For instance
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Sania
Possible spelling mistake found.
Nehwal
, a well-known badminton star had a natural ability to play the forward stroke which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
her to become the youngest badminton player
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph.
from


India.
Thus
, having an inborn ability towards a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
particular
game can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
in a specific sport.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that working
seriously
towards a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
particular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
and regular
Possible spelling mistake. ‘practise’ is British English.
practise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
to succeed. They point to the fact that every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
is born
with the same
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
opportunities and
it is an individual's commitment and dedication towards the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
one to become a star.
For example
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Sachin
Possible spelling mistake found.
Tendulkar
, the
It seems that a possessive apostrophe is missing.
worlds
top-notch cricketer,
Possible spelling mistake. ‘practised’ is British English.
practised
for two years, 8 hours daily without taking a break for a single day;
hence
, catalyzing him to master the art of batting.

In conclusion
, while
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
may vary in their opinion, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
Possible spelling mistake. ‘practising’ is British English.
practising
regularly
and sincere dedication towards a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
a sportsperson to possess various
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
techniques which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
him
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
.
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Language is the road map of a culture. It tells you where its people come from and where they are going.
Rita Mae Brown

IELTS essay Some people believe that to be successful sportperson. one need to hava a natural ability. Others think that hard work and practice are more important. Discuss both these views and give your opinion

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
272 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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