Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.21

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. v. 21
It is often believed that the developed countries are not able to tackle the issue of poverty in the underdeveloped countries just by providing the monetary aid. Thus, they should rather be helped through other methods of assistance. I completely disagree with the above mentioned statement which can be explained in the underlying paragraphs. First of all, it is undeniable that the money is the fundamental aspect of life in the present world. The monetary help holds the paramount importance for the poorer nations in order to pay off their debts which, in turn, will stabilize their financial condition. In addition to this, this charitable work could lower down the cost of groceries and commodities, and will also promote the affordable housing whatsoever. For example, in India, the recent act of demonetization has lead to economic instability and has dragged more than two-thirds of the population below the poverty line. However, the huge concern is that these donations must not get consumed up by the corrupt leaders of such nations. Rather, these must be invested in an efficient and appropriate manner for further development. Furthermore, apart from clearing off their loans, these should be beneficial in numerous fields such as advancement in the health sector, improved stocks and currency exchange rates, modern agricultural innovations, increase in the minimum wage rate and much more. Also, this help will be proven advantageous for the business sector, leading to the rise in the productivity and output. In the recent survey undertaken by the students of Oxford University, it is proven that the happiness level of such underprivileged countries has been risen from 48% to approximately 65 percent in last three years. In conclusion, it can be illustrated that the utilization of the charity money decides the future of the economy. There has been a subsequent fall in the unemployment rate because of the considerable number of job opportunities, leading to the improvement and the success of the communities. Therefore, instead of other types of assistance, the financial support offered to the needful countries will definitely be helpful to curb the problem of poverty.
It is
often
believed that the developed
countries
are not able to tackle the issue of poverty in the underdeveloped
countries
just
by providing the monetary aid.
Thus
, they should
rather
be
helped
through other methods of assistance. I completely disagree with the above mentioned statement which can be
explained
in the underlying paragraphs.

First of all
, it is undeniable that the money is the fundamental aspect of life in the present world. The monetary
help
holds the paramount importance for the poorer nations in order to pay off their debts which, in turn, will stabilize their financial condition.
In addition
to this, this charitable work could lower down the cost of groceries and commodities, and will
also
promote the affordable housing whatsoever.
For example
, in India, the recent act of demonetization has lead to economic instability and has dragged more than two-thirds of the population below the poverty line.

However
, the huge concern is that these donations
must
not
get
consumed up by the corrupt leaders of such nations.
Rather
, these
must
be invested
in an efficient and appropriate manner for
further
development.
Furthermore
, apart from clearing off their loans, these should be beneficial in numerous fields such as advancement in the health sector,
improved
stocks and currency exchange rates, modern agricultural innovations, increase in the minimum wage rate and much more.
Also
, this
help
will
be proven
advantageous for the business sector, leading to the rise in the productivity and output. In the recent survey undertaken by the students of Oxford University, it
is proven
that the happiness level of such underprivileged
countries
has
been risen
from 48% to approximately 65 percent in last three years.

In conclusion
, it can
be illustrated
that the utilization of the charity money decides the future of the economy. There has been a subsequent fall in the unemployment rate
because
of the considerable number of job opportunities, leading to the improvement and the success of the communities.
Therefore
,
instead
of other types of assistance, the financial support offered to the needful
countries
will definitely be helpful to curb the problem of poverty.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. v. 21

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
350 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts