Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people believe that the only purpose of films is to entertain. Others say films should have educational value. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.3

Some people believe that the only purpose of films is to entertain. Others say films should have educational value. v. 3
In this day and age, the development of the movie industry poses a controversial question about the contents of transmitted films. While many people believe that movies should only be allocated to the entertaining goal, I would argue that it is essential for producers to combine a number of educational factors. On the one hand, there are some certain reasons why movies are only associated with entertainment. One of the reasons is that they have originally been created for that purpose. Everyone, including children and adults, mostly choose to watch films in order to mitigate the stress they encounter in their studying and working life. Therefore, should other elements are included in films, no one could realize them or even ignore them. Another reason is that the addition of other factors to a film could reduce its attraction to watchers. Numerous topics such as healthcare, education and politics, which often make front-page headlines, are considered to be inadequate to movies because of their lack of exciting items. As a consequence, there would be fewer people opting for films, resulting in some financial burden on teams of producing movies. On the other hand, there should be a need of adding several educational features to movies for some reasons. Firstly, this paves the way for children to enhance their skills. To illustrate, movies containing tips and ways to efficiently study English and spoken in English enable children to improve their proficiency in that most common language in the world. In combination with visual elements of films, the process would become fascinating, helping them to maintain their motivation. Secondly, educational details in films provide people with a huge amount of cultural information. Hence, they are more likely to broaden their horizons about various customs in the world, which empowers them to travel everywhere without hiring a tour guide. In conclusion, for the aforementioned reasons, I would affirm that the combination between education and relaxation in films are of benefit for viewers, although many people insist on the exclusiveness of soothing contents.
In this day and age, the development of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
industry poses a controversial question about the contents of transmitted films. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be allocated
to the entertaining goal, I would argue that it is essential for producers to combine a number of educational factors.

On the one hand, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
associated with entertainment. One of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
is that they have
originally
been created
for that purpose. Everyone, including children and adults,
mostly
choose to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
films in order to mitigate the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
they encounter in their studying and working life.
Therefore
, should other elements
are included
in films, no one could realize them or even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
them. Another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is that the addition of other factors to a film could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
its attraction to watchers. Numerous topics such as healthcare, education and politics, which
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
front-page headlines,
are considered
to be inadequate to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of their lack of exciting items. As a consequence, there would be fewer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
opting for films, resulting in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
financial burden on teams of producing movies.

On the other hand
, there should be a need of adding several educational features to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
.
Firstly
, this paves the way for children to enhance their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. To illustrate,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
containing tips and ways to
efficiently
study English and spoken in English enable children to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their proficiency in that most common language in the world. In combination with visual elements of films, the process would become fascinating, helping them to maintain their motivation.
Secondly
, educational
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
in films provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with a huge amount of cultural information.
Hence
, they are more likely to broaden their horizons about various customs in the world, which empowers them to travel everywhere without hiring a tour guide.

In conclusion
, for the aforementioned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
, I would affirm that the combination between education and relaxation in films are of benefit for viewers, although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
insist on the exclusiveness of soothing contents.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
Change your language and you change your thoughts.
Karl Albrecht

IELTS essay Some people believe that the only purpose of films is to entertain. Others say films should have educational value. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
338 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts