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some people believe that the best way of learning about life is by listening to the advice of family and friends. other people believe that the best way of learning about life is through personal experiences. compare the advantages of these two different v.3

some people believe that the best way of learning about life is by listening to the advice of family and friends. other people believe that the best way of learning about life is through personal experiences. compare the advantages of these two different v. 3
Nowadays when the subject of choosing the best way has come up, folks have two separate thoughts. which one is receiving advises from the other people you might know and two challenging the different ways yourself, and learn. Although, initially, it may seem simple, writing about this complex and controversial topic is not convenient. Because in which multifarious criteria come together as affecting agents. Even though some people might accept just one of the ideas, I think it depends, I really do agree using others experiences has a lot of advantages. but the conditions among people are not the same, hence the same decision might have different outcomes. So I am going to choose both of them. but in some extent the first one might consequence the better way and to some extent the second one. To illustrate my perspective of the issue, I will vindicate? ? ? reasons in the following essay. Worthy of mentioning the first dimension should have said, is what you can catch more in experiencing the results in personal challenges, can' t be given by others. Despite learning from acquaintances, it is an indisputable fact that not everyone knows each other better than himself. On the other hand, in approaching the idea, apart from the fact mentioned above, one should consider there is not enough time for every individual to try anything and then select the best one. in this case, it can be exemplified that one of the significant decision in anybody' s life is choosing the major in university. To me just account on myself was not a good idea. I remember at that time i couldn' t make up my mind. therefore I asked a lot of people and used their experiences and then pick up the best decision I could ever make. So, as a result, it can be reiterated that the best way for everyone is not sustaining, furthermore, not any human being has enough time to go several ways and accept one of them. so to me using both of these ideas based on our condition, does make more senses.
Nowadays when the subject of choosing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
up, folks have two separate thoughts.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
which
one is receiving advises from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
know and two challenging the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
yourself, and learn.

Although,
initially
, it may seem simple, writing about this complex and controversial topic is not convenient.
“Because” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Because
in which multifarious criteria
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
together as affecting agents.
Even though
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
accept
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
one of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ideas
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it depends, I
really
do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
using others experiences has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
advantages.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
but
the conditions among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not the same,
hence
the same decision
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
outcomes.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
I am going to choose both of them.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
but
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent the
first
one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
consequence the better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
and to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent the second one. To illustrate my perspective of the issue, I will vindicate? ? ?
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
reasons
in the following essay.

Worthy of mentioning the
first
dimension should have said, is what you can catch more in experiencing the results in personal challenges,
Possible spelling mistake found.
can&
#039; t be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
by others. Despite learning from acquaintances, it is an indisputable fact that not everyone knows each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
better than himself.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, in approaching the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
idea
, apart from the fact mentioned above, one should consider there is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time for every individual to try anything and then select the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
best
one.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
this case, it can
be exemplified
that one of the significant decision in
Possible spelling mistake found.
anybody&
#039; s life is choosing the major in university. To me
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
account on myself was not a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
idea
. I remember at that time i
Possible spelling mistake found.
couldn&
#039; t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
up my mind.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
therefore
I asked
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
their experiences and then pick up the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
best
decision I could ever
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
as a result
, it can
be reiterated
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
for everyone is not sustaining,
furthermore
, not any human being has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time to go several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
and accept one of them.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
so
to me using both of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ideas
based on our condition, does
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
more senses.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
24Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Mistakes

IELTS essay some people believe that the best way of learning about life is by listening to the advice of family and friends. other people believe that the best way of learning about life is through personal experiences. compare the advantages of these two different v. 3

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
351 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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