Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people believe that teenagers should concentrate on all school subjects. But others believe that teenagers should focus on the subject that they are good at or that they find the most interest. v. 13

Education has been evolving by leaps and bounds and providing teenagers with new avenues while keeping them up-to-date with today's ever demanding world. Therefore, a fair amount of people believe, these young adults should concentrate on every subject that schools have to teach. I do not completely agree with this opinion because interest based learning creates a more impactful result, such as domain expertise and a lasting and satisfying life ahead. The most compelling reasons to study all the subjects is because it teaches different important core values to these youngsters. For example, Mathematics teaches problem solving skills, while Philosophy teaches ethics and morals. Another possible reason is the idea of Jack-of-all-trade in the working field. Many companies choose to hire people with multiple skills and domain knowledge, hence, this drives education institutions to push all their students to be one. Despite the above arguments, I am of the view that avidity and passion are above all. First of all, when a person is ardent about a subject, no doubt that he/she would give his best effortlessly. This eventually drives the person to be expertise; For instance, being a computer programmer for many years, one can easily spot errors and fix it effortlessly. Secondly, by focusing on the subjects that they loved, it creates a satisfying life, for instance, police offices who most of the time is a lifetime job. To conclude, while both views are commonly held in the society, I believe that by focusing on domains that these teenagers good at is a better option. Not only one could achieve a high degree of expertise, but also an eventual fulfilling life. Given this situation, it is recommended that schools offer these options and not enforcing students to enrol in all subjects.

IELTS essay Some people believe that teenagers should concentrate on all school subjects. But others believe that teenagers should focus on the subject that they are good at or that they find the most interest. Discuss both sides and give your opinion. v.13

Education has been evolving by leaps and bounds and providing
teenagers
with new avenues while keeping them up-to-date with
today
's ever demanding world.
Therefore
, a
fair
amount of
people
believe, these young adults should concentrate on every subject that schools
have to
teach. I do not completely
agree
with this opinion
because
interest based learning creates a more impactful result, such as domain expertise and a lasting and satisfying life ahead. The most compelling reasons to study all the subjects is
because
it teaches
different
important
core values to these youngsters.
For example
, Mathematics teaches problem solving
skills
, while Philosophy teaches ethics and morals. Another possible reason is the
idea
of Jack-of-all-trade in the working field.
Many
companies
choose to hire
people
with multiple
skills
and domain knowledge,
hence
, this drives education institutions to push all their students to be one. Despite the above arguments, I am of the view that avidity and passion are
above all
.
First of all
, when a person is ardent about a subject, no doubt that he/she would give his best
effortlessly
. This
eventually
drives the person to be expertise;
For instance
, being a computer programmer for
many
years, one can
easily
spot errors and
fix
it
effortlessly
.
Secondly
, by focusing on the subjects that they
loved
, it creates a satisfying life,
for instance
, police offices who most of the time is a lifetime job.
To conclude
, while both views are
commonly
held in the society, I believe that by focusing on domains that these
teenagers
good
at is a better option. Not
only
one could achieve a high degree of expertise,
but
also
an eventual fulfilling life.
Given
this situation, it
is recommended
that schools offer these options and not enforcing students to enrol in all subjects.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
24Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
4 paragraphs
293 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resources: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Band score ≥ 7
  • Band score ≤ 6
Similar essay posts: