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some people believe that software programming should be tacht at primary school others think that the focus at this level should be on playing both views opinion v.1

some people believe that software programming should be tacht at primary school others think that the focus at this level should be on playing both views opinion v. 1
In the salad days of millenniums, the society is polarised into two groups almost equally regarding to the notion that, some parents believe that it is best to assist blooming birds with their daily home assignment. While, Others might say that it is the responsibility of the wards to do their own homework. Different people have distinct mindset. The following paragraphs would shed light on both the approaches before making a final Sheets. To commence with the first notion that, many individuals say it is good to help the children. There are myriad things in its favour. First and foremost, if folks taught their offsprings in studies. The children also feel that their parents are caring them. As a result, the wards will be better in their studies and they also are worried about their parents is sitting with them. Secondly, the mother as well as father knows their children weakness and strength in education. Consequently, whenever parents are sitting with them and focus on their weak points. The children will do better in their future studies. Shifting towards the second school of thought, however, it is very essential for children to do their homework by own. If, father or mother both aid them with their daily task. The children will not become self responsible towards his duties. Therefore, sometimes pupils think that parents put study burden on them. Hence, they cannot able to show their Creativity skills as well as hidden talent. Last but not the least, the kids need enjoyment with homework without any pressure of their parents. Having discussed the arguments and counter arguments, I would like to state that the mother and father should not pressurise their pupils. They should only show the right path with the help of motivation thoughts and parents should listen their children every happy and sad emotions. Hammering the last nail, I personally Feel although parents must assist their kids with daily assignments and it should be limited help provided to them which children want it.
In the salad days of millenniums, the society is
Possible spelling mistake. 'polarised' is British English.
polarised
into two groups almost
equally
The phrase 'regarding to' is not correct. Use "regarding" or "regard to".
regarding to
the notion that,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
believe that it is best to assist blooming birds with their daily home assignment.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
, Others might say that it is the responsibility of the wards to do their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
homework.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Different
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have distinct mindset. The following paragraphs would shed light on both the approaches
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
making a final Sheets.

To commence with the
first
notion that,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
individuals say it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. There are myriad things in its
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
.
First
and foremost, if folks taught their
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "offspring", the plural form of the noun 'offspring'?
offsprings
in studies. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
also
feel that their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are caring them.
As a result
, the wards will be better in their
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
studies and
they
also
are worried
about their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
is sitting with them.
Secondly
, the mother
as well
as father knows their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
weakness and strength in education.
Consequently
, whenever
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are sitting with them and focus on their weak points. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
will do better in their future studies.

Shifting towards the second school of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
,
however
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
essential for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to do their homework by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
. If, father or mother both aid them with their daily task. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
will not become self responsible towards his duties.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
pupils
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
put study burden on them.
Hence
, they
Did you mean "cannot be able"?
cannot able
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their Creativity
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
as well
as hidden talent. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not the least, the kids need enjoyment with homework without any pressure of their parents.

Having discussed the arguments and counter arguments, I would like to state that the mother and father should not
Possible spelling mistake. 'pressurise' is British English.
pressurise
their pupils. They should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
the right path with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of motivation thoughts and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
should listen their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
every happy and sad emotions.

Hammering the last nail, I
personally
Feel although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
assist their kids with daily assignments and it should
be limited
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
provided to them which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
want it.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay some people believe that software programming should be tacht at primary school others think that the focus at this level should be on playing both views opinion v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
335 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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