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Some people believe that life should be lived in the moment, and tomorrow is not guaranteed. Others believe that planning a future and focusing on tomorrow is a better approach to life. Which do you agree with and why? v.1

Some people believe that life should be lived in the moment, and tomorrow is not guaranteed. Others believe that planning a future and focusing on tomorrow is a better approach to life. Which do you agree with and why? v. 1
Education makes the person shine like a star in the competitive world, and the students with more skills are rewarded and taken as an example among others. This makes the students work harder and lead them to show their skills to the world. Some people rely on schools that it should reward the students with excellent academic performance, while some believe the students should be rewarded based on their scores. However, the rewarding system holds a significant place to motivate the students to compete, and this reward should be based on both the overall and grade wise performance of the student. To begin with, Undoubtedly, rewards play a crucial part in the student life, and help them to achieve more. Some schools reward students based on their overall academic score, and it makes the student stand unique among others and help him to grow in his profession. Additionally, the student with excellent academic performance is more disciplined and spent his entire time studying. Moreover, in this competitive world every student should show their uniqueness to prove they are worth of that university or job. However, the person with significant improvement in grades is also rewarded, since they are trying their best to achieve something. Even though, they are not good when compared to the students who excelled in everything, he should be taken into consideration because of his competitive nature. The majority of the universities are following this reward system and they are supporting both the rank holders and the best performer of that year, for example, every university provides an outgoing student award to students who performed well in academia and also reward excellence award who scored higher in that year. In my opinion, the schools should provide credit to the person who is improving his grades. It will make him think he is not left out and he has some ability to achieve things, and this will also ensure his performance outside the school. In a nutshell, the rewards play a pivotal role in the student's growth in society. They keep the competitive nature alive in the students' hearts and provide motivation to lead a better life.
Education
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
the person shine like a star in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competitive
world, and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
with more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
are rewarded
and taken as an example among others. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
work harder and lead them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
to the world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
rely on schools that it should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reward
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
with excellent academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
believe the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should
be rewarded
based on their scores.
However
, the rewarding system holds a significant place to motivate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to compete, and this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reward
should
be based
on both the
overall
and grade wise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
of the student.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
Undoubtedly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rewards
play a crucial part in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
life, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to achieve more.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
schools
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reward
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
based on their
overall
academic score, and it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
stand unique among others and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
him to grow in his profession.
Additionally
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
with excellent academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
is more disciplined and spent his entire time studying.
Moreover
, in this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competitive
world every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their uniqueness to prove they are worth of that university or job.

However
, the person with significant improvement in grades is
also
rewarded, since they are trying their best to achieve something.
Even though
, they are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
when compared to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
excelled in everything, he should
be taken
into consideration
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competitive
nature. The majority of the universities are following this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reward
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
system and
they are supporting both the rank holders and the best performer of that year,
for example
, every university provides an outgoing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
award to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
performed well in academia and
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reward
excellence award
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
scored higher in that year.

In my opinion, the schools should provide credit to the person
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
is improving his grades. It will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
him
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
he is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
out and
he has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
ability to achieve things, and this will
also
ensure his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
outside the school.

In a nutshell, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rewards
play a pivotal role in the student's growth in society. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competitive
nature alive in the students' hearts and provide motivation to lead a better life.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that life should be lived in the moment, and tomorrow is not guaranteed. Others believe that planning a future and focusing on tomorrow is a better approach to life. Which do you agree with and why? v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
359 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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