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Some people believe that companies should pay for the damage they cause to the environment, while others say that the government should be responsible for such expenses. Some companies are playing an important role in our environment. The industrious compa v.1

Some people believe that companies should pay for the damage they cause to the environment, while others say that the government should be responsible for such expenses. Some companies are playing an important role in our environment. The industrious compa v. 1
Nowadays, mobile phones have become an essential part of life and one cannot imagine living without phones. A certain segment of the society opine that they should be restricted in public places such as libraries, shops and on buses or trains. While others believe that anyone can use cell phone wherever they want. This notion will discuss both sides of the arguments in details and provide evidence whether mobile phones should be banned or free to use. Firstly, using mobile phone in public places like libraries will distract other people. And, the distraction could completely spoil the reading environment. For instance, a library where people reading books of interest can be easily distracted through the ringtones. Secondly, when people use mobile phones while travelling in a train or a bus, they are creating a disturbance for fellow passenger who may be reading or sleeping. To exemplify, passenger On the other hand, the more people use their mobile phones, the more they will be connected with their families and friends. Due to restrictions in some places they might not find time to catch up with their dear ones. Additionally, mobile phones nowadays come up with a camera and music. This would keep them away from capturing the pictures of the events or taking the selfies in public transport. Also, people love to listen to music while travelling. Cell phones can be easily be kept on vibrate mode, this will not distract people due to loud ringtones of incoming calls. To conclude, using of mobile phones has both advantages and disadvantages. Therefore, in my opinion, wherever we use a mobile phone, we should make sure that the other person is not getting disturbed because of our cell phone usage. In my opinion, they should not be banned.
Nowadays, mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
have become an essential part of life and one cannot imagine living without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
. A certain segment of the society opine that they should
be restricted
in public places such as libraries, shops and on buses or trains. While others believe that anyone can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
wherever they want. This notion will discuss both sides of the arguments in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
and provide evidence whether mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
should
be banned
or free to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
.

Firstly
, using mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
in public places like libraries will distract
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. And, the distraction could completely spoil the reading environment.
For instance
, a library where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
reading books of interest can be
easily
distracted through the ringtones.
Secondly
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
while travelling in a train or a bus, they are creating a disturbance for fellow passenger who may be reading or sleeping. To exemplify,
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
passenger


On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, the more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
, the more they will
be connected
with their families and friends. Due to restrictions in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
places they might not find time to catch up with their dear ones.
Additionally
, mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
nowadays
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
up with a camera and music. This would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
them away from capturing the pictures of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
or taking the selfies in public transport.
Also
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to listen to music while travelling. Cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
can be
easily
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
on vibrate mode, this will not distract
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
due to loud ringtones of incoming calls.

To conclude
, using of mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
has both advantages and disadvantages.
Therefore
, in my opinion, wherever we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
a mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
, we should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
sure that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
person is not getting disturbed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of our cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
usage. In my opinion, they should not
be banned
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that companies should pay for the damage they cause to the environment, while others say that the government should be responsible for such expenses. Some companies are playing an important role in our environment. The industrious compa v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
295 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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