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People can solve important problems in their daily life on their own or with the help from families. The help from the government is no necessary. Agree or disagree v.1

People can solve important problems in their daily life on their own or with the help from families. The help from the government is no necessary. Agree or disagree v. 1
Sports flourishes when combined with competition, unfortunately competition has its own share of pros and cons. Although, there are many successful international sporting events, but there are various problems we have to address with it. In my opinion, I feel the benefits outweighs the problems. Since colonial times, sports have been the one, that treats oppressors and opressee equally on the field. International sports boost empathy, generates respect and helps us to connect with people from various parts of the world. Concurrently, it also helps to boost tourism in the hosting country, symbolises amity and broadens our parochial views about various countries. For instance, the commonwealth games are played by all the countries who were once ruled, boosting the confidence of the once oppressed. Similarly, Olympic games provide a benchmark for a sport person, by respecting him at international level. But as every coin has to sides, international sports also has its own dark side. Evidently, people have tried to cheat the international sports just for the prize by doping and drugging, eventually, tainting their name. Also with increased tourism during the international sporting events many unwanted factors such as prostitution, littering, government property damages have been witnessed. International sports have also been the reason of governments overspending, for example, various countries have spent millions of dollars to make the country look better, which could have been put to better use. We have also examples, wherein due to lax security athletes have been hurt or been infected due to improper sanitation. In conclusion, I would like to say yes, there are problems faced when international sports are organized, but all could be handled by proper management and guidelines, but we also must remember, it's also the ray hope, that help so many people change their lives.
Possible agreement error. You should probably use: "Sport flourishes" or "Sports flourish".
Sports flourishes
when combined with competition, unfortunately competition has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
share of pros and cons. Although, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
sporting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
problems we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
address with it. In my opinion, I feel the benefits outweighs the problems.

Since colonial times,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
have been the one, that treats oppressors and
Possible spelling mistake found.
opressee
equally
on the field.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
International
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
boost empathy, generates respect and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
us to connect with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
parts of the world.
Concurrently
, it
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to boost tourism in the hosting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
,
Possible spelling mistake. 'symbolises' is British English.
symbolises
amity and broadens our parochial views about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
For instance
, the commonwealth games
are played
by all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
who were once ruled, boosting the confidence of the once oppressed.
Similarly
,
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
Olympic games
provide a benchmark for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
person, by respecting him at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
level.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
as every coin
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
sides,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
also
has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
dark side.

Evidently
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have tried to cheat the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
for the prize by doping and drugging,
eventually
, tainting their name.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
with increased tourism during the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
sporting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
unwanted factors such as prostitution, littering,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
property damages have
been witnessed
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
International
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
have
also
been the reason of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
overspending,
for example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have spent millions of dollars to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
look better, which could have
been put
to better
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
. We have
also
examples, wherein due to lax security athletes have
been hurt
or
been infected
due to improper sanitation.

In conclusion
, I would like to say yes, there are problems faced when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
are organized
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
all could
be handled
by proper management and guidelines,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
remember, it's
also
the ray hope, that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay People can solve important problems in their daily life on their own or with the help from families. The help from the government is no necessary. Agree or disagree v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
296 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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