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Some people believe online material should be used by a child to learn whereas others think only printed media should be used Discuss both views and give your opinion v.1

Some people believe online material should be used by a child to learn whereas others think only printed media should be used 1
There is no doubt that wholesome nutrition is essential for school children. While some people think that helping students imbibe good eating habits is the duty of teachers, I would argue that this responsibility should primarily be assumed by parents. On the one hand, those who believe that teachers should help their students take up good dietary habits might contend that they have a greater impact on youngsters. This is because, spend several hours a week, teaching pupils on various subjects which are geared towards moulding their thinking. To illustrate, young children and teenagers, tend to prefer sweets and junk food over nourishing meals, but the resulting issues such as obesity, can hamper their physical and emotional development. By incorporating healthy eating studies and physical activity across the curriculum in fun and creative ways, however, educators have a great chance of helping students adopt nutritious feeding patterns. On the other hand, my view is that parents should primarily assume this duty as they serve as their children’s role models in food habits and life in general. The reason for this is that children start to mimic their parents from babyhood and will tend to adopt the ways they feed. For example, recent studies by the World Health Organization show that 97% of children raised by nutrition-conscious parents adopted healthy food practices as adults. In conclusion, although teachers can greatly influence their students to eat in healthy ways, I firmly believe that parents are responsible for ensuring that their children inculcate the habit of eating healthy since they serve as their examples in eating behaviours, from a young age.
There is no doubt that wholesome nutrition is essential for school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that helping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
imbibe
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
habits
is the duty of teachers, I would argue that this responsibility should
primarily
be assumed
by parents.

On the one hand, those who believe that teachers should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
take up
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
dietary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
habits
might contend that they have a greater impact on youngsters. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, spend several hours a week, teaching pupils on various subjects which
are geared
towards
Possible spelling mistake. 'moulding' is British English.
moulding
their thinking. To illustrate, young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
, tend to prefer sweets and junk food over nourishing meals,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the resulting issues such as obesity, can hamper their physical and emotional development. By incorporating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
studies and physical activity across the curriculum in fun and creative ways,
however
, educators have a great chance of helping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
adopt nutritious feeding patterns.

On the other hand
, my view is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
should
primarily
assume this duty as they serve as their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
role models in food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
habits
and life
in general
.
The reason for this is
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to mimic their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
from babyhood and will tend to adopt the ways they feed.
For example
, recent studies by the World Health Organization
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that 97% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
raised by nutrition-conscious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
adopted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
food practices as adults.

In conclusion
, although teachers can
greatly
influence their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to eat in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
ways, I
firmly
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are responsible for ensuring that their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
inculcate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
habit
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
since they serve as their examples in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviours' is British English.
behaviours
, from a young age.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe online material should be used by a child to learn whereas others think only printed media should be used 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
268 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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