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Some people believe it’s essential for a person’s education to learn to play a musicalinstrument. Others don’t believe music education is important. Which view do youagree with? Explain why. v.1

Some people believe it’s essential for a person’s education to learn to play a musicalinstrument. Others don’t believe music education is important. Which view do youagree with? Explain why. v. 1
Exploring universe has made possible what was considered impossible in erstwhile times and with this, journey to the space is now a reality. Given the growing advancement in science, it is being strongly considered that the universal excursions by common men for recreational purposes may be the next step forward. Owing to the rampant developments in this direction, it is my conviction that space tourism will definitely be achievable within a foreseeable time to come. Reasons aplenty support this argument. Numerous experiments by developed nations for life on another planet such as Marsh have proven that with the sufficient supplies of oxygen, food and water, men will be able to stay alive for a few days on it. To exemplify, NASA had sent three of its astronauts on Marsh in June, 2018 and they could comfortably live on Marsh for a span of two days. Further, it has been observed that Marsh had oceans several million years ago, which were later on converted to desserts and rocky surfaces due to gas storms. Efforts for tracing the existence of water are currently being devised by the research agencies worldwide and if such proofs are found, it will be quite plausible to expect life on Marsh. For instance, Mangalyan mission by India was specifically designed to study the characteristic of the atmosphere and have successfully sent images of the Mars for further research. Pondering upon what has been discussed above, it will be prudent to conclude that with the widespread reach of modern technology, man will be able to have footprints on diverse planets making it possible for a wider public to experience the thrill of touring an altogether different world.
Exploring universe has made possible what
was considered
impossible in erstwhile times and with this, journey to the space is
now
a reality.
Given
the growing advancement in science, it is being
strongly
considered that the universal excursions by common
men
for recreational purposes may be the
next
step forward. Owing to the rampant developments in this direction, it is my conviction that space tourism will definitely be achievable within a foreseeable time to
come
.

Reasons aplenty support this argument. Numerous experiments by developed nations for life on another planet such as Marsh have proven that with the sufficient supplies of oxygen, food and water,
men
will be able to stay alive for a few days on it. To exemplify, NASA had
sent
three of its astronauts on Marsh in
June, 2018
and they could
comfortably
live
on Marsh for a span of two days.

Further
, it has
been observed
that Marsh had oceans several million years ago, which were later on converted to desserts and rocky surfaces due to gas storms. Efforts for tracing the existence of water are
currently
being devised
by the research agencies worldwide and if such proofs
are found
, it will be quite plausible to
expect
life on Marsh.
For instance
,
Mangalyan
mission by India was
specifically
designed to study the characteristic of the atmosphere and have
successfully
sent
images of the Mars for
further
research.

Pondering upon what has
been discussed
above, it will be prudent
to conclude
that with the widespread reach of modern technology,
man
will be able to have footprints on diverse planets making it possible for a wider public to experience the thrill of touring an altogether
different
world.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe it’s essential for a person’s education to learn to play a musicalinstrument. Others don’t believe music education is important. Which view do youagree with? Explain why. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
279 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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