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Some people believe it is important to give gifts and presents to friends and family to show that we care about them. Others think that there are better ways to show affection to them. v. 1

Expressing love towards our loved ones is extremely important. While some people think that giving gifts is the best way to do this since materials are the only way to show love, others think respect is a better way. I think we can do this by following both approaches partially. We often express love and care by giving materials on different occasions such as birthdays and marriage anniversaries. In many societies, the economic value of a gift is also considered to measure the extent of love. For example, in Punjabi weddings, mothers often gift gold jewelry to their daughters as an expression of love. If they fail to give this gift, the society sees this as a sign of broken relationships. Similarly, birthdays are occasions to give presents to fulfill long pending wishes. While a boy may expect his parents to gift him a cricket kit to play the game at a professional level, a girl wants them to present a dress for a party. Merely expressing love through a hug is not sufficient. On the other hand, sometimes a gift is not desirable to show care. Instead, it destroys the innocence of relationships. An old parent, for example, does not need a gift from her children but the warmth of relationships. She wants them to live with her, cook her some food, and talk to her regularly. Merely giving her a gift and then staying away from her is not sufficient. In many cultures, such as Indian and Japanese, touching an elder’s feet is more important than giving a gift occasionally. In conclusion, I think that while giving presents is important on special occasions to show love and care, we need to care personally by serving others in day-to-day life. Both are important and we need to strike a balance between the two approaches.

IELTS essay Some people believe it is important to give gifts and presents to friends and family to show that we care about them. Others think that there are better ways to show affection to them. Discuss both the views and give your own opinion. v.1

Expressing
love
towards our
loved
ones is
extremely
important
. While
some
people
think
that
giving
gifts
is the best way to do this since materials are the
only
way to
show
love
, others
think
respect is a better way. I
think
we can do this by following both approaches
partially
. We
often
express
love
and
care
by
giving
materials on
different
occasions such as birthdays and marriage anniversaries. In
many
societies, the economic value of a
gift
is
also
considered to measure
the extent of
love
.
For example
, in Punjabi weddings, mothers
often
gift
gold jewelry to their daughters as an expression of
love
. If they fail to give this
gift
, the society
sees
this as a
sign
of broken relationships.
Similarly
, birthdays are occasions to give presents to fulfill long pending wishes. While a boy may
expect
his parents to
gift
him a cricket kit to play the game at a professional level, a girl wants them to present a dress for a party.
Merely
expressing
love
through a hug is not sufficient.
On the other hand
,
sometimes
a
gift
is not desirable to
show
care
.
Instead
, it
destroys
the innocence of relationships. An
old
parent,
for example
, does not need a
gift
from her children
but
the warmth of relationships. She wants them to
live
with her, cook her
some
food, and talk to her
regularly
.
Merely
giving
her a
gift
and then staying away from her is not sufficient. In
many
cultures, such as Indian and Japanese, touching an elder’s feet is more
important
than
giving
a
gift
occasionally
.
In conclusion
, I
think
that while
giving
presents is
important
on special occasions to
show
love
and
care
, we need to
care
personally
by serving others in day-to-day life. Both are
important and
we need to strike a balance between the two approaches.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
33Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
Essay
4 paragraphs
305 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resources: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Band score ≥ 7
  • Band score ≤ 6
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