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Some people believe government should spend money on building train and subway lines to reduce traffic congestion. Others think that building more and wider roads is the better way to reduce traffic congestion. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.5

Some people believe government should spend money on building train and subway lines to reduce traffic congestion. Others think that building more and wider roads is the better way to reduce traffic congestion. v. 5
Over the recent years, traffic congestion is an aching problem of a variety of countries around the world. While some maintain that constructing more and wider road is an effective way to alleviate this problem, I feel that building trains and subway lines are a better measure. There are two justifiable reasons why constructing and expanding roads can bring about some merits. In the first place, this method can mitigate the volume of transportation. These days, with the explosion of population, there are a myriad of people using private transport such as cars or motorbikes in order to commute on the streets, which leads to the movement jams happening in lots of regions especially in big cities. Erecting wider road systems, therefore, can help to tackle this issue because it can diminish obstruction during rush hours. In the second place, this solution can save national budget. In some developing countries, building subway lines is not feasible on the grounds that these systems require a high initial investment and cost a great deal of money, so extending roads is cheaper and can save more money for governments. On the contrary, I am of the opinion that building train and metro lines is more effective to enhance the traffic situation. This approach will create some positive impacts on the environment and time. When it comes to the environment, when trains and subway lines are constructed, there will be less private transport as well as a public one on the streets. Accordingly, we can reduce the amount of carbon dioxide from cars, buses or motorbikes emitted into the atmosphere, which results in optimistic effects on the environment. In terms of time, trains and subways can move with a high-speed, so it can save more time for city dwellers because of the fact that they do not need to spend a lot of hours pacing back and forth to work when they use trains or underground lines. To sum up, building wider roads can have some advantages, but I believe that it is better when governments spend money constructing train and metro lines because it will brings more benefits compared to roads’ construction
Over the recent years, traffic congestion is an aching problem of a variety of countries around the world. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
maintain that constructing more and wider
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
is an effective way to alleviate this problem, I feel that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subway
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lines
are a better measure.

There are two justifiable reasons why constructing and expanding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
can bring about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
merits. In the
first
place, this method can mitigate the volume of transportation. These days, with the explosion of population, there are a
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "myriads"?
myriad
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
using private transport such as cars or motorbikes in order to commute on the streets, which leads to the movement jams happening in lots of regions
especially
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
cities. Erecting wider
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
systems,
therefore
, can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to tackle this issue
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it can diminish obstruction during rush hours. In the second place, this solution can save national budget. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subway
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lines
is not feasible on the grounds that these systems require a high initial investment and cost a great deal of money,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
extending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
is cheaper and can save more money for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
.

On the contrary
, I am of the opinion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
and metro
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lines
is more effective to enhance the traffic situation. This approach will create
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impacts on the environment and time. When it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to the environment, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subway
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lines
are constructed
, there will be less private transport
as well
as a public one on the streets.
Accordingly
, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the amount of carbon dioxide from cars, buses or motorbikes emitted into the atmosphere, which results in optimistic effects on the environment. In terms of time,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subways
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
with a high-speed,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it can save more time for city dwellers
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "because".
because of the fact that
they do not need to spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
hours pacing back and forth to work when they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
or underground lines.

To sum up,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
wider
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
can have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advantages,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I believe that it is better when
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
spend money constructing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
and metro
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lines
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it will
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "bring"
brings
more benefits compared to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads’
construction
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe government should spend money on building train and subway lines to reduce traffic congestion. Others think that building more and wider roads is the better way to reduce traffic congestion. v. 5

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
358 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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