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Some people believe capital punishment must be banned while others think in order to protect individuals; criminals who commit certain crimes must be executed. What is your opinion? v.1

Some people believe capital punishment must be banned while others think in order to protect individuals; criminals who commit certain crimes must be executed. What is your opinion? v. 1
As the criminal cases rise, it is much important to give sentence to offend as per the evil committed by him/her. Nowadays, criminal activities are thriving due to rising unemployment rates among youngsters. As a result, some dwellers commit high levels of wrongdoing and they have to face death penalty according to their offence. I totally disagree with this statement reveals capital punishment should be banned. It is very evident that people who involve in lawlessness are able to send behind the bars. As per my views, capital punishment should be given because of some reasons. Firstly, it encourages the other individual disconnect the criminal activities if someone holds death penalty. Secondly, it would provide right lessons in the community to those who wants to commit any kind of dangerous misdeed in the future. Moreover, it is true that having lawlessness in the society is not a good message for people. For instance - if anyone kills someone and found guilty, it means that this person has no reputation in his/her local area. So, others would learn a lesson from this kind of person. Furthermore, people will decline the rates of misconduct in the community. However, dwellers can stay their life happily and life could become simple as there would be no wrong activity happens in the society. In conclusion, I personally assume that the death penalty should be executed in order to teach someone not to commit lawlessness in the future. As the consequences, an ordinary person can live for others and for himself as well.
As the criminal cases rise, it is much
important
to give sentence to offend as per the evil committed by him/her. Nowadays, criminal activities are thriving due to rising unemployment rates among youngsters.
As a result
,
some
dwellers commit high levels of
wrongdoing and
they
have to
face death penalty according to their
offence
. I
totally
disagree with this statement reveals capital punishment should
be banned
.

It is
very
evident that
people
who involve in lawlessness are able to
send
behind the bars. As per my views, capital punishment should be
given
because
of
some
reasons.
Firstly
, it encourages the other individual disconnect the criminal activities if someone holds death penalty.
Secondly
, it would provide right lessons in the community to those who wants to commit any kind of
dangerous
misdeed in the future.

Moreover
, it is true that having lawlessness in the society is not a
good
message for
people
.
For instance
-
if anyone kills someone and found guilty, it means that this person has no reputation in his/her local area.
So
, others would learn a lesson from this kind of person.
Furthermore
,
people
will decline the rates of misconduct in the community.
However
, dwellers can stay their life
happily
and life could become simple as there would be no
wrong
activity happens in the society.

In conclusion
, I
personally
assume that the death penalty should
be executed
in order to teach someone not to commit lawlessness in the future. As the consequences, an ordinary person can
live
for others and for himself
as well
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS essay Some people believe capital punishment must be banned while others think in order to protect individuals; criminals who commit certain crimes must be executed. What is your opinion? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
257 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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