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Some people argue that we should do research into their family history. Others, agree with the view that we should focus on the present and future generations. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. v.3

Some people argue that we should do research into their family history. Others, agree with the view that we should focus on the present and future generations. v. 3
In regards to heritage and legacies, a need for deeper grasp of family bloodline' s past achievements has been recognized as of late. Living and upcoming members, in opposition, are recommended to be the center of attention instead. Personally speaking, neither perspectives hold convincing arguments that they can offer joyful spirits to those exercising or receiving them. First of which, intensive study into the triumphs of our ancestors may create disappointment if not anxiety. Since careers like farming or pottery were common in ages passed, seeker of pride in the champion of their previous generations would likely face disparity between expectations and mediocre reality. Contrastively, they may also compare the admirable efforts of forefathers to their current struggles, thus forming self-consciousness and depression under its weight. Suicides and mental illnesses rates, in actuality, were disturbingly high where said symptoms exist and originated from domestic pressure to upkeep the family image. Secondly, shifting the limelight onto current family offspring can damage relationships between relatives. For illustration, it is not an unheard of concern among Vietnamese youth in which family reunions are associated with scrutiny of personal lives and accomplishments. To its extremes, many young people have not refrained from excitement in separation from family' s gazes, despite cutting family ties in returns. This means that little appreciation stems from living up to family names nor was there any for judgements of failing attempts at it. In summary, while detailed insights into ancestral glory might end up straining one' s mental health, emphasized attention towards that of descendants have a tendency to break families apart. It is in my opinion that a collective support for individual efforts aspired by traditional resilience over hardship is the more probable strategy.
In regards to
heritage and legacies, a need for deeper grasp of
family
bloodline&
#039; s past achievements has
been recognized
as of late. Living and upcoming members, in opposition,
are recommended
to be the center of attention
instead
.
Personally
speaking, neither perspectives hold convincing arguments that they can offer joyful spirits to those exercising or receiving them.

First
of which, intensive study into the triumphs of our ancestors may create disappointment if not anxiety. Since careers like farming or pottery were common in ages passed, seeker of pride in the champion of their previous generations would likely face disparity between expectations and mediocre reality.
Contrastively
, they may
also
compare the admirable efforts of forefathers to their
current
struggles,
thus
forming self-consciousness and depression under its weight. Suicides and mental illnesses rates, in actuality, were
disturbingly
high where said symptoms exist and originated from domestic pressure to upkeep the
family
image.

Secondly
, shifting the limelight onto
current
family
offspring can damage relationships between relatives. For illustration, it is not
an unheard of
concern among Vietnamese youth in which
family
reunions
are associated
with scrutiny of personal
lives
and accomplishments. To its extremes,
many
young
people
have not refrained from excitement in separation from
family&
#039; s gazes, despite cutting
family
ties in returns. This means that
little
appreciation stems from living up to
family
names nor was there any for judgements of failing attempts at it.

In summary, while detailed insights into ancestral glory might
end
up straining
one&
#039; s mental health, emphasized attention towards that of descendants have a tendency to break
families
apart. It is in my opinion that a collective support for individual efforts aspired by traditional resilience over hardship is the more probable strategy.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes
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IELTS essay Some people argue that we should do research into their family history. Others, agree with the view that we should focus on the present and future generations. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
286 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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