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Some people are becoming more interested in family history research. Others argue we should focus on the present and future generation. v.1

Some people are becoming more interested in family history research. Others argue we should focus on the present and future generation. v. 1
Mankind is connected to each other in the form of a chain of relationships dated back centuries ago. It is a well-established fact in various societies that the grand ancestors of all human being are Adam and Eve. Some people are curious to discover their family tree while others believe that one should concentrate on their current and coming generations. This essay will analyse both views and will present an opinion in the conclusion. The human being has always remained anxious in discovering their true identity and are always keen in finding out where they belong to and who were their ancestors. Researching family unit facilitate people to understand how they are connected to others. People feel proud when they discover that their forefather's achievements and sacrifices are still admired by societies. Moreover, in some communities, a family is considered respectable and credible if they have a strong family background and notable history. For instance, in some Asian countries, families ask for the relationship tree of each other before they decide to finalise the marriage. On the contrary, few people believe that our present is more critical than our past and one should devote his time and efforts on future generations rather than digging the past. Proponents of this view point say that researching family history might reveal some facts that can be embarrassing for our current generation. For instance, children will feel uncomfortable and distracted if they discover that one of their ancestors was not patriotic or committed several crimes based on religious ethnicity. They further say that exploring family history would not do any good as that era cannot be changed and one should concentrate on raising respectable manners and etiquette in our generations to make them a better member of a society. To recapitulate, the aforementioned provides plausible arguments in favour of both views. However, in my opinion researching family relations assist people to track their origin, achievement of their ancestors and so on, which can soothe and comfort their hearts.
Mankind
is connected
to each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
in the form of a chain of relationships dated back centuries ago. It is a well-established fact in various societies that the grand
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ancestors
of all human being are Adam and Eve.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are curious to discover their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
tree while others believe that one should concentrate on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
and coming generations. This essay will
Possible spelling mistake. 'analyse' is British English.
analyse
both views and will present an opinion in the conclusion.

The human being has always remained anxious in discovering their true identity and are always keen in finding out where they belong to and who were their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ancestors
. Researching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
unit facilitate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to understand how they
are connected
to others.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
feel proud when they discover that their forefather's achievements and sacrifices are
still
admired by societies.
Moreover
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
communities, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
is considered
respectable and credible if they have a strong
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
background and notable history.
For instance
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Asian countries,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ask for
the relationship tree of each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
they decide to
Possible spelling mistake. 'finalise' is British English.
finalise
the marriage.

On the contrary
, few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that our present is more critical than our past and one should devote his time and efforts on future generations
rather
than digging the past. Proponents of this view point say that researching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
history might reveal
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
facts that can be embarrassing for our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
generation.
For instance
, children will feel uncomfortable and distracted if they discover that one of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ancestors
was not patriotic or committed several crimes based on religious ethnicity. They
further
say that exploring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
history would not do any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
as that era cannot be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
and one should concentrate on raising respectable manners and etiquette in our generations to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them a better member of a society.

To recapitulate, the aforementioned provides plausible arguments in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of both views.
However
, in my opinion researching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
relations assist
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
track
their origin, achievement of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ancestors
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on, which can soothe and comfort their hearts.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people are becoming more interested in family history research. Others argue we should focus on the present and future generation. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
334 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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