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Some organizations believe that their employees should dress smartly. Others value quality of work above appearance. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.3

Some organizations believe that their employees should dress smartly. Others value quality of work above appearance. v. 3
Many people claim that companies employee has to dress nicely where as other believes work quality should be taken into consideration rather than dressing. The following essay will further elaborate both the sides and draw a plausible conclusion. There is no denying that dressing smartly improves the confidence level of an employee. In other words, good clothes/uniform build up a own confidence. For an industry who frequently interact with clients, while presentation or marketing of product an employee looks presentable in front of customers and the smart clothing increases the his confidence as a result he able to deliver nicely in the presentation. Moreover, certain clothes of an organization / formal clothes indicates the status of an organization in the market. Nowadays, smart clothing shows a person's personality, while in the meetings this smart appearance attracts the customer's or the other party's attention and builds the good image their the organization. This help for a company to improve their status in the industries. On the other hand, many people believe that work quality, productivity, creativity of an employee should be valued first. In addition the employee should have the skills and knowledge that will help the company. The employee must have certain level skills as per his designation so it will lead to company growth. Furthermore, no dress restrictions improves the employee relationships to some extent. As level of an employee in an organization can be judged by their certain dressing subsequently it creates partiality among all employees. No restriction for dressing will improve the bond among all people of the company. For instance, a service providing employee interacting with a customer allows customers to feel the employee just as a normal human being as their friend instead of feeling any burden. This builds a bond between organization and customer and consequently customer stays loyal to one company. Thus considering all the points, I believe that creativity should be valued first because of employees knowledge and talent results industries growth and then smart dressing should be second priority to improve the status in the market
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
claim that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
dress
nicely
Did you mean "whereas"?
where as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
believes work quality should
be taken
into consideration
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dressing
. The following essay will
further
elaborate both the sides and draw a plausible conclusion.

There is no denying that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dressing
smartly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improves
the confidence level of an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
clothes/uniform build up
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
confidence. For an industry who
frequently
interact with clients, while presentation or marketing of product an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
looks presentable in front of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smart
clothing increases
A determiner cannot combine with a possessive pronoun. Did you mean simply "his confidence" or "the confidence"?
the his confidence
as a result
Did you mean "he is" or "he was"?
he
able to deliver
nicely
in the presentation.
Moreover
, certain clothes of an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
/ formal clothes indicates the status of an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
in the market. Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smart
clothing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
a person's personality, while in the meetings this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smart
appearance attracts the customer's or the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
party's attention and builds the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
image their the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
their status in the industries.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that work quality, productivity, creativity of an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
should
be valued
first
. In
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
addition
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
should have the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and knowledge that will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
have certain level
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
as per his designation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it will lead to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
growth.
Furthermore
, no dress restrictions
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improves
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
relationships to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
level of an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
in an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
can
be judged
by their certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dressing
subsequently
it creates partiality among all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
. No restriction for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dressing
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
the bond among all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
.
For instance
, a service providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
interacting with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
to feel the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
as a normal human being as their friend
instead
of feeling any burden. This builds a bond between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
and
consequently
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
stays loyal to one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.

Thus
considering all the points, I believe that creativity should
be valued
first
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
knowledge and talent results industries growth and then
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dressing
should be second priority to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
the status in the market
15Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
45Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS essay Some organizations believe that their employees should dress smartly. Others value quality of work above appearance. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
344 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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