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Some governments say how many children a family can here in their country. They may control the number of children someone has through taxes. It is sometimes necessary and right for a government to control the population in this way. v.1

Some governments say how many children a family can here in their country. They may control the number of children someone has through taxes. It is sometimes necessary and right for a government to control the population in this way. v. 1
Pets have become human beings' friends for a long time and have been playing an important role in their owners' daily lives. Whether owning a pet is the right decision or not, I personally believe,  depends on individual's personal conditions. The essay will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of having a pet. To begin with, owning a suitable and lovely pet will be a great decision to its owners. Firstly, it not only will provide emotional comfort to its owner, but also will help its owner stay healthy physically and mentally. Pets are excellent companions for the elderly who live alone.  Secondly, having pets for children will help them to nurture positive personal characters, such as responsibility, mercy, and so on. Last not the least, pets also protect their owners' safety and properties. Dogs for the blind not only will lead their owners' ways, but also protect them from traffic accidents. However, keeping a pet is not a right choice for certain people.   For example,  a single employee who has a busy working schedule or travels frequently on business trips,   owning a pet will create many difficulties for him or her, such as distracting owner's concentration, wasting owner's time and so on.  Furthermore, Keeping a pet is an expensive and will bring financial burden to owners because owners will spend  money on their pets' food, medical cover and insurance.  Sometime, pets will cause allergic reactions to their owners or carry parasites and transmit them to their owners. In conclusion,   owning a pet is not always a right decision for certain people with busy daily schedules. However, proper pets will enrich their owners' lives because they function as their owner's companions, emotional supporters, and safety guards. Pets have become one of the community members worldwide.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Pets
have become human beings' friends for a long time and have been playing an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owners'
daily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. Whether
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owning
a pet is the right decision or not, I
personally
believe,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
depends on individual's personal conditions. The essay will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of having a pet.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owning
a suitable and lovely pet will be a great decision to its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owners
.
Firstly
, it not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
will provide emotional comfort to its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owner
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owner
stay healthy
physically
and mentally.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Pets
are excellent companions for the elderly who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
alone.  
Secondly
, having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
for children will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to nurture
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
personal characters, such as responsibility, mercy, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. Last not the least,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
also
protect their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owners'
safety and properties. Dogs for the blind not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
will lead their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owners'
ways,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
protect them from traffic accidents.

However
, keeping a pet is not a right choice for certain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
  
For example
,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
a single employee who has a busy working schedule or travels 
frequently
on business trips,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owning
a pet will create
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
difficulties for him or her, such as distracting owner's concentration, wasting owner's time and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.  
Furthermore
, Keeping a pet is an expensive and will bring financial burden to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owners
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owners
will spend
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
money on their pets' food, medical cover and insurance.  Sometime,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
will cause allergic reactions to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owners
or carry parasites and transmit them to their owners.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
  owning
a pet is not always a right decision for certain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
with busy daily schedules.
However
, proper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
will enrich their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owners'
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they function as their owner's companions, emotional supporters, and safety guards.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Pets
have become one of the community members worldwide.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some governments say how many children a family can here in their country. They may control the number of children someone has through taxes. It is sometimes necessary and right for a government to control the population in this way. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
286 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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