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some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? v.10

some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? v. 10
In today's modern world, language plays an indispensable role in both studies and jobs as well as during socialising. Thus, instead of studying language at secondary school, some professionals encourage children to start learning a foreign language at primary school. Although this proposal has some drawbacks, I would argue that there are more benefits. On the one hand, I believe that the advantages of learning a new language at primary school are more significant. Firstly, children at a young age are fast learners. As their brains are still programmed to acquire their mother tongue, which facilitates learning another language. Secondly, introducing a foreign language earlier enables the children to get accustomed to using it. It is acknowledged that children at this stage pick up languages with less selfconscious compared to adolescents at secondary school. Rather than studying a language, they tend to subconsciously imitate what the speaker says. In this way, children are more likely to use the language with more confidence. Finally, elementary schools provide a relaxed language learning environment for children. Generally, the first aim of primary schools is to educate students while entertaining. For example, there may be abundant interesting class activities, such as role play, where children are motivated to learn the foreign language under a pleasant atmosphere, stimulating children’s interest of studying the new language. On the other hand, there may be some disadvantages. For one thing, it could be a waste of time since pupils need to focus on core subjects, especially math, science, and their own mother tongue language, which are considered to be more essential than a foreign language. For another, children may get confused because of learning native and foreign languages simultaneously. Specifically, it is claimed that bilingual children develop the ability to talk more slowly than monolingual kids. As a result, it could have a negative impact on their language development. Nevertheless, as long as schools establish a scientific and reasonable teaching pedagogy, such limitations mentioned above can be ameliorated. In conclusion, it seems to me that the benefits of learning a foreign language at earlier age do outweigh the drawbacks.
In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's modern world,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
plays an indispensable role in both studies and jobs
as well
as during
Possible spelling mistake. 'socialising' is British English.
socialising
.
Thus
,
instead
of studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
at secondary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
professionals encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
at primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. Although this proposal has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks, I would argue that there are more benefits.

On the one hand, I believe that the advantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
a new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
at primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
are more significant.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
at a young age are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
learners. As their brains are
still
programmed to acquire their mother tongue, which facilitates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
.
Secondly
, introducing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
earlier enables the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
accustomed to using it. It
is acknowledged
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
at this stage pick up
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
with less
Possible spelling mistake found.
selfconscious
compared to adolescents at secondary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
.
Rather
than studying a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
, they tend to
subconsciously
imitate what the speaker says. In this way,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are more likely to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
with more confidence.
Finally
, elementary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
provide a relaxed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
environment for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
Generally
, the
first
aim of primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
is to educate students while entertaining.
For example
, there may be abundant interesting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
activities, such as
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
role play
, where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are motivated
to learn the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
under a pleasant atmosphere, stimulating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
interest of studying the new language.

On the other hand
, there may be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages. For one thing, it could be a waste of time since pupils need to focus on core subjects,
especially
math, science, and their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
mother tongue
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
, which
are considered
to be more essential than a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
. For another,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
confused
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
native and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
simultaneously
.
Specifically
, it
is claimed
that bilingual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
develop the ability to talk more
slowly
than monolingual kids.
As a result
, it could have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
development.
Nevertheless
, as long as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
establish a scientific and reasonable teaching pedagogy, such limitations mentioned above can
be ameliorated
.

In conclusion
, it seems to me that the benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
at earlier age do outweigh the drawbacks.
17Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
45Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? v. 10

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
351 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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