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Long distant flights uses more fuel than cars and brings pollution to the environment. We should discourage non-essential flight rather than limit the use of cars. To what extent do you agree or disagree. v.1

Long distant flights uses more fuel than cars and brings pollution to the environment. We should discourage non-essential flight rather than limit the use of cars. v. 1
Nowadays, an air transportation has become more popular than others mode of vehicles. It is natural seen that the issue of the environment is becoming serious in all over the world. Technology is making more and more vehicles, they spread fossil fuels, which is perilous for the atmosphere. Those vehicles which travel for long distance, they use more fuels than cars and bring the pollution to the environment. We must demotivate non vital flit and reduce the number of cars on the roads. I completely disagree with the given hook. I will discuss some possible causes in the upcoming paragraphs. To begin with, aeroplanes are gaining popular more than another, as every individual want to travel by air. It not only saves their time, but also a comfortable way to travel. Firstly, flights are the essential mode transportation for covering long distances in a short time. So we can not blindly say that we should discourage its use. People don't have any other alternatives, if they want travel such distances without wasting their time. Moreover, cars are very common among people, presently each and every person owns a car. The growth of the automobile industry is astonishing. Whereas access to flights is limited not everyone can use it, even though the fares are reduced drastically, but for a common man's flight journey is still a huge thing for their budget. Secondly, in this LPG (Liberalisation, Privatisation and Globalisation) era no country wants to take such an awkward decision, because no one can think of a country without adequate air travel facilities. Moreover, it will actually effect economy very badly. Presently every country is open to the world, people are going in and out of a country as a routine and also every country is earning foreign money by exporting items to the world market. All these are made possible only because of the adequate air travel facilities Lastly, there is lots of R&D work is going on in aviation fuel and jet engines. Experts are able to come out with more sophisticated fuel alternatives which has less impact on the environment also they are successfully introduced more fuel efficient engines. Furthermore aero plane manufacturers are trying to include lightweight material in the manufacturing process to reduce the weight of the carrier without compromising the security factor. In conclusion, Just because of a pollution factor we cannot reduce the use of basic necessities like air travel, instead we need to find out how to reduce pollution content. On top of that cars are the one's creating more environmental hazards mainly because of its waste use.
Nowadays, an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
transportation has become more popular than others mode of vehicles. It is natural
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the issue of the environment is becoming serious in all over the world. Technology is making more and more vehicles, they spread fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuels
, which is perilous for the atmosphere. Those vehicles which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
for long distance, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuels
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
and bring the pollution to the environment. We
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
demotivate
It appears that a hyphen is missing.
non vital
flit and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
on the roads. I completely disagree with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
hook. I will discuss
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
possible causes in the upcoming paragraphs.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
Possible spelling mistake. 'aeroplanes' is British English.
aeroplanes
are gaining popular more than another, as every individual want to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
. It not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
saves their time,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
a comfortable way to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
.
Firstly
, flights are the essential mode transportation for covering long distances in a short time.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
we can not
blindly
say that we should discourage its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
don't have any other alternatives, if they want
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
such distances without wasting their time.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
common among
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
,
presently
each and every person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
owns
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
. The growth of the automobile industry is astonishing. Whereas access to flights
is limited
not everyone can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it,
even though
the fares are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
drastically
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
for a common
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
's flight journey is
still
a huge thing for their budget.

Secondly
, in this LPG (
Possible spelling mistake. 'Liberalisation' is British English.
Liberalisation
,
Possible spelling mistake. 'Privatisation' is British English.
Privatisation
and
Possible spelling mistake. 'Globalisation' is British English.
Globalisation
) era no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
wants to take such an awkward decision,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
no one can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
without adequate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
facilities.
Moreover
, it will actually
Did you mean "affect"?
effect
economy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
badly
.
Presently
every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
is open to the world,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are going in and out of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
as a routine and
also
every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
is earning foreign money by exporting items to the world market. All these
are made
possible
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the adequate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
facilities


Lastly
, there is lots of R&D work is going on in aviation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
and jet engines. Experts are able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
out with more sophisticated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
alternatives which has less impact on the environment
also
they are
successfully
introduced more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
efficient engines.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Furthermore
aero
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plane
manufacturers are trying to include lightweight material in the manufacturing process to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
the weight of the carrier without compromising the security factor.

In conclusion
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Just
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of a pollution factor we cannot
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
Consider using "necessities".
basic necessities
like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
,
instead
we need to find out how to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
pollution content.
On top of that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
are the one's creating more environmental hazards
mainly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of its waste
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
.
16Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
31Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Mistakes

IELTS essay Long distant flights uses more fuel than cars and brings pollution to the environment. We should discourage non-essential flight rather than limit the use of cars. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
434 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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