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Some experts believe it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary schools rather than secondary school. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v.1

Some experts believe it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary schools rather than secondary school. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1
It is argued by some specialists that elementary schools are the best place to inculcate foreign dialect in the mind of the students. However, some believe that it should be the responsibility of high schools to teach them non-native dialect. This essay will first demonstrate why young children are better at acquiring a new style, and how earning an additional voice would be a tool for personal development, followed by an analysis of how the primary disadvantage, namely extra burden on a student may impact their mental health. There are several advantages of studying a foreign sound from the elementary level. First and foremost, during this period, children are more flexible and they can grasp any style very easily. To exemplify, since the birth of a juvenile, when parents talk in their native accent, children tend to pick the words quickly as children are more curious and eager to learn new things at their tender age. Therefore, proficiency and fluency in new or unfamiliar dialect can be achieved in a primary school which would help them enormously in the long run. Secondly, excellence in foreign languages is beneficial for professional development. Therefore, a long time is needed for acquiring an accent, every infant has to start learning a second prose as early as possible; otherwise, their future will not be safe. A potential disadvantage of learning multiple languages in primary school is that the infant may have one additional subject to study. As a result, pupils have to study more subjects in the elementary class which would impact their concentration and difficult to learn something else besides their curriculum subjects. To illustrate, in India, children who are enrolled in learning a new style in primary classes will be loaded with more tonnes of homework every day. Consequently, they got less time to spend in retreating activities and would suffer from various mental illnesses like insomnia, anxiety, etc. In conclusion, while the kids have a decent grasping power to learn a non-native jargon and learning another vocabulary would be an asset for them. However, opting for the additional subject would be an extra burden on a infant, which may adversely affect the mental health of a toddler. Thus, the advantages of learning a foreign style at an early age outweigh the disadvantages.
It
is argued
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
specialists that elementary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
are the best place to inculcate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
dialect in the mind of the students.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
believe that it should be the responsibility of high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
to teach them non-native dialect. This essay will
first
demonstrate why young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are better at acquiring a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
style
, and how earning an additional voice would be a tool for personal development, followed by an analysis of how the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
primary
disadvantage,
namely
extra burden on a student may impact their mental health.

There are several advantages of studying a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
sound from the elementary level.
First
and foremost, during this period,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are more
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
flexible and
they can grasp any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
style
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
easily
. To exemplify, since the birth of a juvenile, when parents talk in their native accent,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
tend to pick the words
quickly
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are more curious and eager to learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
things at their tender age.
Therefore
, proficiency and fluency in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
or unfamiliar dialect can
be achieved
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
which would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them
enormously
in the long run.
Secondly
, excellence in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
languages is beneficial for professional development.
Therefore
, a long time
is needed
for acquiring an accent, every infant
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
a second prose as early as possible;
otherwise
, their future will not be safe.

A potential disadvantage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
multiple languages in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is that the infant may have one additional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
to study.
As a result
, pupils
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
study more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
in the elementary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
which would impact their concentration and difficult to learn something else
besides
their curriculum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
. To illustrate, in India,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
who
are enrolled
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
style
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
primary
classes will
be loaded
with more tonnes of homework every day.
Consequently
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
less time to spend in retreating activities and would suffer from various mental illnesses like insomnia, anxiety, etc.

In conclusion
, while the kids have a decent grasping power to learn a non-native jargon and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
another vocabulary would be an asset for them.
However
, opting for the additional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
would be an extra burden on
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
infant, which may
adversely
affect the mental health of a toddler.
Thus
, the advantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
style
at an early age outweigh the disadvantages.
16Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
34Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
Language is the blood of the soul into which thoughts run and out of which they grow.
Oliver Wendell Holmes

IELTS essay Some experts believe it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary schools rather than secondary school. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
381 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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