Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some expert believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? v.3

Some expert believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? v. 3
Some specialists think that education systems should make a plan to teach foreign language to kids in primary school is better than secondary school. Due to some reasons which will be mentioned, I also reckon learning second language in first years of school is better. Some people, believe, that children should taught more important subject rather than foreign language in primary school. In other word in this group, second language is not important as well as other lessons such as math and religion from one side. In addition they think, it is better to guide school kids in identified route by specifics topics, which second language do not belong to. In fact this outlook, emphasize on children’s upbringing with applying religion and local principle. From other side, this perspective, reckon children will also be able to take foreign language lesson in secondary school as well as primary school. Conversely, other experts say, school children should be situated in learning of foreign language in first years of school, why this subject may be considered more important rather than other. In other word, we should never forget that language is the most significant way of communication especially for non-English countries, inasmuch as English language is the common in world and it is important for everybody to be able to speak with. Take as an illustration rarely could we find anywhere which English language is not applicable. Furthermore, it has been approved that, learning language in childish is more comfortable than other times. In conclusion, I could infer, it is more advantageous for our children, to learn foreign language in primary school, specially English which is applicable everywhere this days.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
specialists
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that education systems should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a plan to teach
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
to kids in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is better than secondary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. Due to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons which will
be mentioned
, I
also
reckon learning second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
in
first
years of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is better.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, believe, that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should
The verb 'should' requires the base form of the verb: "teach"
taught
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
subject
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
word in this group, second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
is not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
lessons such as math and religion from one side. In
The comma is probably missing here: "addition, they".
addition they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
, it is better to guide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
kids in identified route by specifics topics, which second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
do not belong to.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
fact this outlook, emphasize on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
upbringing with applying religion and local principle. From
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
side, this perspective, reckon
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
will
also
be able to take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
lesson in secondary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
primary
school.

Conversely
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
experts say,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should
be situated
in learning of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
in
first
years of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, why this subject may
be considered
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
word, we should never forget that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
is the most significant way of communication
especially
for non-English countries, inasmuch as English
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
is the common in world and it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
for everybody to be able to speak with. Take as an illustration rarely could we find anywhere which English
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
is not applicable.
Furthermore
, it has
been approved
that, learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
in childish is more comfortable than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
times.

In conclusion
, I could infer, it is more advantageous for our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, to learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
,
specially
English which is applicable everywhere
It seems that a possessive apostrophe is missing.
this days
.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
46Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Some expert believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
277 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts