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Some countries have introduced a law to limit working hours for employees. Why is this law introduced? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development? v.4

Some countries have introduced a law to limit working hours for employees. Why is this law introduced? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development? v. 4
There has been a drastic increase in working hours in some developing countries. Employees have been pushed to work harder and longer without any additional incentives than their wages. Therefore, many countries have passed new laws to control and legitimate duty hours. This will send a good message to workers and will lift their morale and dedication towards work. There have been numerous examples, where companies are making their employees work longer than normal duty hours. The primary advantage of this is to increase their production by spending the same expenditure. However, this has led to severe problems. Employees are feeling immense pressure from their employers to meet targets and deadlines. This is one of the pivotal reasons that employees are more susceptible to illness. Therefore, some legislation required in working hours. Newly introduces rules have substantial impacts on workers performance and health. They have become more responsible and productive. The quality of the work has also increased after applying these rules. In addition to this, people health conditions have significantly improved. Now they have more time to spend with their family that helped them tremendously mitigate their stress and tensions. Additional time also provides opportunities to make themselves social with their peer group. To sum up, I would like to say that excessive works from workers have detrimental effects on their physical and psychological health. Limiting work hours will bring several changes in their lifestyle that would lead them towards better and successful life. However, in many countries employees are obliged to follow longer hours, as there is no law to protect them.
There has been a drastic increase in working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Employees
have
been pushed
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
harder and longer without any additional incentives than their wages.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries have passed new laws to control and legitimate duty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
. This will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
message to workers and will lift their morale and dedication towards work.

There have been numerous examples, where
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
are making their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
longer than normal duty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
. The primary advantage of this is to increase their production by spending the same expenditure.
However
, this has led to severe problems.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Employees
are feeling immense pressure from their employers to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
targets and deadlines. This is one of the pivotal reasons that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
are more susceptible to illness.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
legislation required in working hours.

Newly
introduces
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
have substantial impacts on workers performance and health. They have become more responsible and productive. The quality of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
has
also
increased after applying these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
.
In addition
to this,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
health conditions have
significantly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
they have more time to spend with their family that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
them
tremendously
mitigate their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and tensions. Additional time
also
provides opportunities to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
themselves social with their peer group.

To sum up, I would like to say that excessive works from workers have detrimental effects on their physical and psychological health. Limiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
will bring several
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in their lifestyle that would lead them towards better and successful life.
However
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
are obliged
to follow longer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
, as there is no law to protect them.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
14Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay Some countries have introduced a law to limit working hours for employees. Why is this law introduced? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development? v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
264 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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