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Some countries are struggling with increases in crime rates. Some believe that having more police on the streets is best way to reduce and combat crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.3

Some countries are struggling with increases in crime rates. Some believe that having more police on the streets is best way to reduce and combat crime. v. 3
Few countries are confronted with an increase in the number of criminal activities. It is often argued the best method of minimizing the crime rates is by deploying more police on the streets. I completely disagree with this notion and believe that illegal activities can be controlled by increasing awareness among the public and setting up CCTV cameras on the streets. First of all, I believe that the most effective method of reducing the number of crimes is by making citizens aware of the situations where such events can happen. For that, the government should launch campaigns in order to provide pertinent information to city dwellers about people with criminal behaviour. When the public becomes aware of the crimes that can happen in particular situations, they will take preventive measures to avoid them. For instance, people will avoid walking alone at night, particularly in areas where there are fewer people. Also, they will refrain from carrying a large amount of cash and wearing expensive jewellery in crowded streets. This will eventually lead to a reduction in the number of criminal incidences. Secondly, installing CCTV cameras on the streets throughout the city can help curb crime rates to some extent because it will be tough for criminals to hide their identity with those cameras everywhere. Even if some people with ill motives try to indulge in criminal acts, they will be caught using the CCTV footage which will discourage criminals for those activities. Furthermore, this will help the government reduce the number of police personnel employed for security purposes. Thus, installation of the surveillance system might reduce the crime more effectively with lesser number of police on the streets. In conclusion, I strongly disagree with the view that the effective method to reduce illegal activities is by increasing the number of police in streets because increasing awareness among citizens and installing CCTVs for surveillance are far better methods.
Few countries
are confronted
with an increase in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
argued the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
method
of minimizing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rates is by deploying more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
police
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
streets
. I completely disagree with this notion and believe that illegal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
can
be controlled
by increasing awareness among the public and setting up CCTV cameras on the streets.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, I believe that the most effective
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
method
of reducing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
is by making citizens aware of the situations where such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
can happen. For that, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should launch campaigns in order to provide pertinent information to city dwellers about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
. When the public becomes aware of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
that can happen
in particular
situations, they will take preventive measures to avoid them.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will avoid walking alone at night,
particularly
in areas where there are fewer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Also
, they will refrain from carrying a large amount of cash and wearing expensive
Possible spelling mistake. 'jewellery' is British English.
jewellery
in crowded
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
streets
. This will
eventually
lead to a reduction in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
incidences.

Secondly
, installing CCTV cameras on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
streets
throughout the city can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
curb
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rates to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it will be tough for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hide
their identity with those cameras everywhere. Even if
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with ill motives try to indulge in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
acts, they will
be caught
using the CCTV footage which will discourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
for those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
.
Furthermore
, this will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
police
personnel employed for security purposes.
Thus
, installation of the surveillance system might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
more
effectively
with lesser
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
police
on the streets.

In conclusion
, I
strongly
disagree with the view that the effective
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
method
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
illegal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
is by increasing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
police
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
streets
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
increasing awareness among citizens and installing
Possible spelling mistake found.
CCTVs
for surveillance are far better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
methods
.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
37Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Some countries are struggling with increases in crime rates. Some believe that having more police on the streets is best way to reduce and combat crime. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
317 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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