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Some countries are struggling with an increase in the rate of crime. Many people think that having more police on the streets is the only way to reduce crime. To what extent do you agree? v.8

Some countries are struggling with an increase in the rate of crime. Many people think that having more police on the streets is the only way to reduce crime. v. 8
Crime is like a cancer in this modern era. Many countries of this world are facing the issue of tremendous increase in crime rate. Because of which, people believe that there should be more police officers patrolling the streets. I partly agree with this view. Firstly, patrolling can prevent illegal activities as this might help create a sense of fear in the minds of criminals. The lack of surveillance leads to more unlawful activities. If the police officers are out on the streets of the violent areas, then there will be less illegal activities because they can get caught. Secondly, it gives citizens a sense of protectiveness. For example, if there is something unlawful happening, then it is easier for people to report it to the police officers and they can arrive the crime scene faster. This can help in saving the victim from the adversaries. However, I do believe that placing more force on the ground is not a solution to this problem. For the surveillance purposes, cameras can be installed on the streets, shopping areas etc. To solve this problem, the mentality of the people, law system etc. , needs to be changed. For instance, there are many officials of law who are corrupt and have joined hands with the bad guys to earn some extra money. The administration needs to make sure that such officers get severe punishments for their betrayal to the community. Moreover, the government must try to make stricter laws and ensure that they get implemented at the ground level. All the criminals must get strict punishments. To conclude, I do agree that installing more police officers on the ground can help prevent lawlessness, but this is not the effective way. To effectively reduce crime, the government needs to work on changing the mentality of people, make stricter laws, so that no offender gets out without any sentence.
Crime
is like a cancer in this modern era.
Many
countries of this world are facing the issue of tremendous increase in
crime
rate.
Because
of which,
people
believe that there should be more
police
officers
patrolling the streets. I partly
agree
with this view.

Firstly
, patrolling can
prevent
illegal activities as this might
help
create a sense of fear in the minds of criminals. The lack of surveillance leads to more unlawful activities. If the
police
officers
are out on the streets of the violent areas, then there will be less illegal activities
because
they can
get
caught.
Secondly
, it gives citizens a sense of protectiveness.
For example
, if there is something unlawful happening, then it is easier for
people
to report it to the
police
officers and
they can arrive the
crime
scene faster. This can
help
in saving the victim from the adversaries.

However
, I do believe that placing more force on the ground is not a solution to this problem. For the surveillance purposes, cameras can
be installed
on the streets, shopping areas etc. To solve this problem, the mentality of the
people
,
law
system etc.
,
needs to be
changed
.
For instance
, there are
many
officials of
law
who are corrupt and have
joined
hands with the
bad
guys to earn
some
extra money. The administration needs to
make
sure that such
officers
get
severe punishments for their betrayal to the community.
Moreover
, the
government
must
try to
make
stricter
laws
and ensure that they
get
implemented at the ground level. All the criminals
must
get
strict punishments.

To conclude
, I do
agree
that installing more
police
officers
on the ground can
help
prevent
lawlessness,
but
this is not the effective way. To
effectively
reduce
crime
, the
government
needs to work on changing the mentality of
people
,
make
stricter
laws
,
so
that no offender
gets
out without any sentence.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some countries are struggling with an increase in the rate of crime. Many people think that having more police on the streets is the only way to reduce crime. v. 8

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
314 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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