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Some countries are struggling with an increase in the rate of crime. Many people think that having more police on the streets is the only way to reduce crime. To what extent do you agree? v.3

Some countries are struggling with an increase in the rate of crime. Many people think that having more police on the streets is the only way to reduce crime. v. 3
Humanity is ignoring the importance of the ecosystem in these hectic years. I personally believe that urbanization is the root of this negligence and strict rules or epidemic outbreaks can give insights into the population of this planet. In the past, people lived friendly with nature appreciating all of its value, whereas urban centres are magnetizing people from a rural background in which we forget how necessary forests and wild animals are. To be more specific, modern choices of living have caused people to move into urban spots where they are able to live their dream being with luxury. For example, individuals who dwell in cities are not only provided with gas, electricity and drinking water, but also security, job opportunities as well as modern architecture that add awe to their lives. In contrast, the environment itself supported people with those facilities which were time-consuming. Therefore, the natural earth is being forgotten by most people who left their origin, which has been turned into cities. Of course, life in cities is really fast and the majority of people do not have enough time to consider the significance of the natural world. However, there two primary methods that are able to explain are the role of ecology. Firstly, governments can impose strict regulations towards individuals, then they will have to take care of trees and birds in cities which may remind of nature’s significance. Moreover, they should take the initiative of multiplying green zones in city centres. Secondly and even more importantly, diseases can teach life lessons about the importance of wildlife. For example, every five years the planet is witnessing epicentres where viruses take the life of the population since cities have been built on the habitats of the pure world in which nature tries to fight against its land. In conclusion, it is true that nowadays most people forget the leading role of the natural world since they possess a little amount of time to think about it. Although it is so, authorities, as well as the nature itself, have the power to make those people learn about the environment.
Humanity is ignoring the importance of the ecosystem in these hectic years. I
personally
believe that urbanization is the root of this negligence and strict
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
or epidemic outbreaks can give insights into the population of this planet.

In the past,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
friendly with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
appreciating all of its value, whereas urban
Possible spelling mistake. 'centres' is British English.
centres
are magnetizing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from a rural background in which we forget how necessary forests and wild animals are. To be more specific, modern choices of living have caused
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
into urban spots where they are able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
their dream being with luxury.
For example
, individuals who dwell in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
provided with gas, electricity and drinking water,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
security, job opportunities
as well
as modern architecture that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
awe to their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
In contrast
, the environment itself supported
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with those facilities which were time-consuming.
Therefore
, the natural earth is
being forgotten
by most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
their origin, which has
been turned
into cities.

Of course
, life in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
is
really
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
and the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time to consider the significance of the natural world.
However
, there two primary methods that are able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
are the role of ecology.
Firstly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
can impose strict regulations towards individuals, then they will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
take care of trees and birds in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
which may remind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature’s
significance.
Moreover
, they should take the initiative of multiplying green zones in city
Possible spelling mistake. 'centres' is British English.
centres
.
Secondly
and even more
importantly
, diseases can teach life lessons about the importance of wildlife.
For example
, every five years the planet is witnessing
Possible spelling mistake. 'epicentres' is British English.
epicentres
where viruses take the life of the population since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
have
been built
on the habitats of the pure world in which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
tries to fight against its land.

In conclusion
, it is true that nowadays most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
forget the leading role of the natural world since they possess a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
amount of time to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about it. Although it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, authorities,
as well
as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
itself, have the power to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
learn about the environment.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some countries are struggling with an increase in the rate of crime. Many people think that having more police on the streets is the only way to reduce crime. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
351 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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