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Some companies sponsor sports as a way to advertise themselves. Some people think it is good, while others think there are disadvantages to this. Discuss both sides and give your opinion? v.3

It is irrefutably true that, these days, most companies are seeking different approaches, such as sponsoring sports events, to increase their sales. While some individuals opine that this approach is actually an effective marketing tool for the companies to promote their products, others believe that it has some major drawbacks. I bolster the former view and think that funding sports events is not only promoting companies primarily, but also providing a platform for all sports advocates and passionate players. On the one hand, sports sponsorship is widely considered a lucrative industry, and there are several benefits associated with this marketing scheme. Firstly, it provides a golden opportunity for companies to promote their products within a large community more comprehensively, making a significant contribution to boosting the sales rates of companies. For example, BMW, which was the main sponsor of the last world cup, invested billions of dollars for sponsoring the football matches reached a record high in its sales after the seasons, according to the International Sports Journal. Secondly, when a company hits its sales target, their employees would also enjoy a better income through incentive programmes such as target related payments, leading to increased productivity. Furthermore, sports sponsorship may even contribute to the development of sports infrastructures in other countries, through the construction of sports stadiums especially in low-income countries, with the money raised from this advertising scheme. Finally, sponsoring sports events makes a major contribution to the global peace and reduced tension between countries as different nations participate in the events in a peaceful common platform. On the contrary, it is believed by some that advertising through sports events is a deceptive way of promoting commercial goods. With increased commercialization of athletics and other sports activities, there is a higher chance of sportsmanship corruption. Furthermore, it would result in impulsive buying as people would be encouraged to purchase products which they rarely use in daily life. For instance, people buy products just because it is endorsed by their favorite cricket player, Virat Kohli. To conclude, funding sports events can be advantageous for both the parties, the sports committees and the company sponsoring them. Controversial issues and conflicts can be avoided if the companies sell quality products and the sports team plays honestly without adapting to any corruption methods like match-fixing and bribery.
It is
irrefutably
true that, these days, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
are seeking
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
approaches, such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sponsoring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
, to increase their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals opine that this approach is actually an effective marketing tool for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
to promote their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
, others believe that it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
major drawbacks. I bolster the former view and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that funding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
promoting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
primarily
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
providing a platform for all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
advocates and passionate players.

On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
sponsorship is
widely
considered a lucrative industry, and there are several benefits associated with this marketing scheme.
Firstly
, it provides a golden opportunity for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
to promote their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
within a large community more
comprehensively
, making a significant contribution to boosting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
rates of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
.
For example
, BMW, which was the main sponsor of the last world cup, invested billions of dollars for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sponsoring
the football matches reached a record high in its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
after the seasons, according to the International
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sports
Journal.
Secondly
, when a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
hits its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
target, their employees would
also
enjoy a better income through incentive
Possible spelling mistake. ‘programmes’ is British English.
programmes
such as target related payments, leading to increased productivity.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
sponsorship may even contribute to the development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
infrastructures in other countries, through the construction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
stadiums
especially
in low-income countries, with the money raised from this advertising scheme.
Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sponsoring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
a major contribution to the global peace and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
tension between countries as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
nations participate in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
in a peaceful common platform.

On the contrary
, it
is believed
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
that advertising through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
is a deceptive way of promoting commercial
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
. With increased commercialization of athletics and other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
activities, there is a higher chance of sportsmanship corruption.
Furthermore
, it would result in impulsive buying as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
would
be encouraged
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
which they rarely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
in daily life.
For instance
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
is endorsed
by their favorite cricket player,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Virat
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kohli
.

To conclude
, funding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
can be advantageous for both the parties, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
committees and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sponsoring
them. Controversial issues and conflicts can
be avoided
if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
sell quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
team plays
honestly
without adapting to any corruption methods like match-fixing and bribery.
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IELTS essay Some companies sponsor sports to advertise themselves. Some people think it is good while others think there are disadvantages.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
384 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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