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Some believe that dangerous sports should be banned, while others think that people should be free to choose. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. v.1

Some believe that dangerous sports should be banned, while others think that people should be free to choose. v. 1
Dangerous sports such as bullfighting, car racing, and paragliding have become commonplace in many countries. Some people opine that these activities ought to be prohibited while others oppose this notion and I strongly believe in the latter point of view. Both perspectives along with their reasons will be discussed in the following lines. Many menacing activities include taking risks that could lead to injuries and even death in athletes and spectators. Formula One car race is one of these activities that have resulted in horrible accidents in contestants and spectators. Some professionals think that stakeholders ought to issue measures and laws that inhibit these dangerous sports. Moreover, these games are a threat to many youngsters who watch them and may practise in the future. On the contrary, others believe that the government should not compromise adventurers’ freedom. Although adventurous sports have many risks in practising them, they can curb the desire for thrill and adventure in many young players. Whilst American football which is a considered a safe game, it resulted in more injuries and deaths than paragliding. In other words, taking safety measures such as deploying a reinforced wall in front of spectators in car racing may be a solution for many risks. Added to that, the government should impose precautions that may prohibit accidents. In conclusion, both views have merits and negative ramifications but I perceive the notion that banning adventurous games is not the solution because taking safety measures is a more logical and considerable resolution. This means that prohibition is not a real solution because if young generations have the ambition to be contestants in these games, they will break the law to do that.
Dangerous
sports such as bullfighting, car racing, and paragliding have become commonplace in
many
countries.
Some
people
opine that these activities ought to
be prohibited
while others oppose this notion and I
strongly
believe in the latter point of view. Both perspectives along with their reasons will
be discussed
in the following lines.

Many
menacing activities include taking
risks
that could lead to injuries and even death in athletes and spectators. Formula One car race is one of these activities that have resulted in horrible accidents in contestants and spectators.
Some
professionals
think
that stakeholders ought to issue measures and laws that inhibit these
dangerous
sports.
Moreover
, these
games
are a threat to
many
youngsters who
watch
them and may
practise
in the future.

On the contrary
, others believe that the
government
should not compromise adventurers’ freedom. Although adventurous sports have
many
risks
in
practising
them, they can curb the desire for thrill and adventure in
many
young players. Whilst American football which is a considered a safe game, it resulted in more injuries and deaths than paragliding.
In other words
, taking safety measures such as deploying a reinforced wall in front of spectators in car racing may be a solution for
many
risks
.
Added
to that, the
government
should impose precautions that may prohibit accidents.

In conclusion
, both views have merits and
negative
ramifications
but
I perceive the notion that banning adventurous
games
is not the solution
because
taking safety measures is a more logical and considerable resolution. This means that prohibition is not a real solution
because
if young generations have the ambition to be contestants in these
games
, they will break the law to do that.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Some believe that dangerous sports should be banned, while others think that people should be free to choose. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
279 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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