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Society is experiencing an increase in many problems such as crime and drug abuse due to urbanization. Give some suggestions to control this trend. v.1

Society is experiencing an increase in many problems such as crime and drug abuse due to urbanization. Give some suggestions to control this trend. v. 1
Industrialization is an inevitable part of the development of any economy. Although it had improved the standard of living and economic growth, a tremendous increase in the number of crimes and illegal activities had resulted too. There are numerous measures which people, as well as governments, can adopt to tackle these issues. Perhaps the immediate remedy is to provide awareness, particularly in slum areas, about the consequences of being against law. For instance, many metros specifically in developing countries would have a category of people and area, dwelling in poor conditions. They are not able to survive because of the high cost of living in cities. The most effective method to reduce the crime rate among those people to provide awareness, free education and apprenticeships. Hence, it appears to make them fit in the workforce for their livelihood instead of approaching illegal activities to earn money. A further counteraction is by implementing stringent laws and regulations against criminals to restrain them to re-offend. For instance, in the middle east countries strict laws and punishments deter others to commit crimes or related activities. As a result, as per the pronouncements, there seldom people commit crimes. Another remedy is police patrolling in crime-prone areas might ensure the safety of people in society. That which we can see in western countries like the US and the UK. This mobility of service helps victims to approach police personnel with an immediate effect, while they encounter any threats. Overall, to reiterate, in spite of the benefits which brought to human lives, urbanisation has also its own darker side such as high crime rates. It can be effectively deal with several measures by local authorities through awareness and education to enhance the quality of life, also police surveillance and jurisprudence to assure peaceful living.
Industrialization is an inevitable part of the development of any economy. Although it had
improved
the standard of living and economic growth, a tremendous increase in the number of
crimes
and illegal activities had resulted too. There are numerous measures which
people
,
as well
as
governments
, can
adopt to
tackle these issues.

Perhaps the immediate remedy is to provide awareness,
particularly
in slum areas, about the consequences of being against law.
For instance
,
many
metros
specifically
in
developing countries
would have a category of
people
and area, dwelling in poor conditions. They are not able to survive
because
of the high cost of living in cities. The most effective method to
reduce
the
crime
rate among those
people
to provide awareness, free education and apprenticeships.
Hence
, it appears to
make
them fit in the workforce for their livelihood
instead
of approaching illegal activities to earn money.

A
further
counteraction is by implementing stringent laws and regulations against criminals to restrain them to re-offend.
For instance
, in the
middle east
countries strict laws and punishments deter others to commit
crimes
or related activities.
As a result
, as per the pronouncements, there seldom
people
commit
crimes
. Another remedy is police patrolling in crime-prone areas might ensure the safety of
people
in society. That which we can
see
in western countries like the US and the UK. This mobility of service
helps
victims to approach police personnel with an immediate effect, while they encounter any threats.

Overall
, to reiterate,
in spite of
the benefits which brought to human
lives
,
urbanisation
has
also
its
own
darker side such as high
crime
rates. It can be
effectively
deal
with several measures by local authorities through awareness and education to enhance the quality of life,
also
police surveillance and jurisprudence to assure peaceful living.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
10Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Society is experiencing an increase in many problems such as crime and drug abuse due to urbanization. Give some suggestions to control this trend. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
298 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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