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Smokers have rights too, so they should be allowed to smoke in public places. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? v.1

Smokers have rights too, so they should be allowed to smoke in public places. with this statement? v. 1
Smoking is becoming increasingly popular. It is argued by some people that smokers have the freedom to smoke in the open. In my opinion, I disagree with this statement, because this habit is dangerous to the health of non-smokers as well as encourage young people to embrace the habit. Firstly, taking of cigar in the public can cause severe health issues to people that do not smoke. In other words, inhaling of the fumes can cause reactions such as; coughing, chest pain and irritations which can lead to various forms of sicknesses if constantly ingested. For example, a Lagos General hospital reported an increase in the number of patients that got hospitalized due to exposition to people that take cigarettes. Thus, this habit has a detrimental effect on the well being of the people that stays within the environment of smokers. Another point to consider is that intake of tobacco publicly can result into encouraging young people to consume the product. This is because as it has been generally accepted in the society, it becomes easier for them to accept this act as the norm without fully understanding the implications to their body. For instance, there was a report by the Health Society of Nigeria in 2019 that people under the age of 18 that smokes has increased in the last decade. Consequently, this has negative impacts on the youths as the morals and values of a society is greatly affected. In conclusion, the right to smoke in public places should not be accepted because this can cause health challenges and impact negatively on the younger generation of a society.
Smoking is becoming
increasingly
popular. It
is argued
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that smokers have the freedom to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoke
in the open. In my opinion, I disagree with this statement,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this habit is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
of non-smokers
as well
as encourage young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to embrace the habit.

Firstly
, taking of cigar in the public can cause severe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
issues to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoke
.
In other words
, inhaling of the fumes can cause reactions such as; coughing, chest pain and irritations which can lead to various forms of sicknesses if
constantly
ingested.
For example
, a Lagos General hospital reported an increase in the number of patients that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
hospitalized due to exposition to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that take cigarettes.
Thus
, this habit has a detrimental effect on the
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well being
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that stays within the environment of smokers.

Another point to consider is that intake of tobacco
publicly
can result into encouraging young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to consume the product. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
as it has been
generally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
, it becomes easier for them to accept this act as the norm without
fully
understanding the implications to their body.
For instance
, there was a report by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Society
of Nigeria in 2019 that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
under the age of 18 that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smokes
has increased in the last decade.
Consequently
, this has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts on the youths as the morals and values of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
is
greatly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
.

In conclusion
, the right to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoke
in public places should not be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this can cause
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
challenges and impact
negatively
on the younger generation of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Smokers have rights too, so they should be allowed to smoke in public places. with this statement? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
270 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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