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Should education and health care be free of charge and funded by the government or should it be the responsibility of the people to pay for these services Discuss the above and give your opinion using example v.1

Should education and health care be free of charge and funded by the government or should it be the responsibility of the people to pay for these services Discuss the above and give your opinion using example v. 1
Human beings have needed five basic need to sustain, education and health care shear a major part. Education status and availability of health care facility denotes the success of a country, government should make more effective plan to provide this basic need to people. Some people think that individuals should pay all of their expenses for education and health, but as far as I am concerned, my personal preference is government should pay all of the cost of education and health care facility. For a few significant reasons I fill that way, my reasons goes as follow. First of all, citizen of any government country should pay their tax, so they deserve some feedback from the government. Educated people and health is one of the great assets of any country, the help our economic development, social improvement. If government should pay all the expenses for education and health it will give a great feedback in future, a huge number of working capable people were available to develop our economic situation and make a sustainable development. For example, in Bangladesh educations rate was only 34% before 2000 when government make the primary and secondary education free for all student the number of educated people should increase now it almost two fold form the 2000 level. Secondly, technological development make all think available to people but it costly, sometime people is not able to bear it. So government needs to make policy to pay all medical help and health care facility to the local people. When people should pay their health care fees they should not able to get better treatment because lack of money and assets. When government should pay all fees, then an equality situation created in our society, government should able to fulfill all of their plans and policy. In sum, when government pays all of the expenditure of education and health, they can ensure all people get better education and medical facility. However, when people should pay it creates an imbalance society that will be harmful for our society. So government should pay all the expenses to make a sustainable society.
Human beings have needed five basic need to sustain,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
shear a major part.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Education
status and availability of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
facility denotes the success of a country,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
more effective plan to provide this basic need to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that individuals should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
all of their expenses for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
as far as I
am concerned
, my personal preference is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
Consider using "all the".
all of the
cost of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
facility. For a few significant reasons I fill that way, my reasons goes
Did you mean "as follows"?
as follow
.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, citizen of any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
country should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
their tax,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they deserve
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
feedback from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
. Educated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
is one of the great assets of any country, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
our economic development, social improvement. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
all the expenses for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
it will give a great feedback
Did you mean: "in the future"?
in future
, a huge number of working capable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
were available to develop our economic situation and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
a sustainable development.
For example
, in Bangladesh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
educations
rate was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
34%
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
2000 when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
Consider using third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: "makes".
make
the primary and secondary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
free for all student the number of educated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should increase
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
it almost
The adjective or adverb 'twofold' needs to be written as one word.
two fold
form the 2000 level.

Secondly
, technological development
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
available to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
It seems that a verb is missing after "it". Please verify.
it
costly, sometime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
not able to bear it.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
needs to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
policy to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
all medical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
facility to the local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
fees they should not able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
better treatment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
lack of money and assets. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
all fees, then an equality situation created in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
Did you mean "should be able"?
should able
to fulfill all of their plans and policy.

In sum, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pays
Consider using "all the".
all of the
expenditure of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
, they can ensure all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and medical facility.
However
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
it creates an imbalance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
that will be harmful for our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
all the expenses to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
a sustainable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
65Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Mistakes
Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere.
Chinese Proverb

IELTS essay Should education and health care be free of charge and funded by the government or should it be the responsibility of the people to pay for these services Discuss the above and give your opinion using example v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
353 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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