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Should a city try to preserve its old, historical buildings or destroy them and replace them with modern buildings? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v.2

Should a city try to preserve its old, historical buildings or destroy them and replace them with modern buildings? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 2
In recent times, there has been a widespread debate on whether city should keep the historical buildings or not. While some people believe that historical buildings should be destroyed and replaced by big towers, I hold the opposite view. I think governments should preserve their historical sites. To begin with, when cities keep their historical buildings and do not destroy them, they can preserve their identity. Historical buildings represent people’s culture. Most people tend to connect structural sculpture and historical places to the culture who lived in that place. For example, the pyramids in Egypt can tell people about the huge royal family that lived at that time. These people were very tall and strong to build that big structure. Therefore, without observing pyramids in Egypt, People would not know much about the ancient who lived in Egypt long time ago. Furthermore, archeologists were able to find the style of cooking for ancient Egyptian people by examining some tools inside the pyramid. As a result, people until now know the identity and all the traditional attitude for ancient Egyptian. They would not know that if these historical sites were destroyed. Adding to the previous point, preserving historical buildings enable governments to improve their economic status. They can earn a lot of money from tourists who come and visit these historical places. For instance, the government in Paris improved their income in 2002 to double by allowing tourists to pay a fee when they were visiting Evil Tower. Another example is that the United Sates government made a lot of money in 2005 from tourists who came and visit the State of Librety in New York city. Obviously, most governments can increase their income by preserving their historical sites and open them to tourists. In conclusion, I encouraged governments to keep all historical sites in the same place and invest more money to keep them.
In recent times, there has been a widespread debate on whether city should
keep
the
historical
buildings
or not. While
some
people
believe that
historical
buildings
should be
destroyed
and replaced by
big
towers, I hold the opposite view. I
think
governments
should preserve their
historical
sites.

To
begin
with, when cities
keep
their
historical
buildings
and do not
destroy
them, they can preserve their identity.
Historical
buildings
represent
people’s
culture. Most
people
tend to connect structural sculpture and
historical
places
to the culture
who
lived
in that
place
.
For example
, the pyramids in Egypt can
tell
people
about the huge royal family that
lived
at that time. These
people
were
very
tall and strong to build that
big
structure.
Therefore
, without observing pyramids in Egypt,
People
would not know much about the ancient
who
lived
in Egypt long time ago.
Furthermore
, archeologists were able to find the style of cooking for ancient Egyptian
people
by examining
some
tools inside the pyramid.
As a result
,
people
until
now
know the identity and all the traditional attitude for ancient Egyptian. They would not know that if these
historical
sites were
destroyed
.

Adding to the previous point, preserving
historical
buildings
enable
governments
to
improve
their economic status. They can earn
a lot of
money from tourists
who
come
and visit these
historical
places
.
For instance
, the
government
in Paris
improved
their income in 2002 to double by allowing tourists to pay a fee when they were visiting Evil Tower. Another example is that the United Sates
government
made
a lot of
money in 2005 from tourists
who
came and visit the State of
Librety
in
New York city
.
Obviously
, most
governments
can increase their income by preserving their
historical
sites and open them to tourists.

In conclusion
, I encouraged
governments
to
keep
all
historical
sites in the same
place
and invest more money to
keep
them.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
42Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Should a city try to preserve its old, historical buildings or destroy them and replace them with modern buildings? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
314 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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