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SCIENCE ADVANCED SO MUCH THAT IT CAN NOW MAKE IT POSSIBLE FOR PEOPLE TO LIVE 100 YEARS OR EVEN 200 YEARS. SOME PEOPLE THINK ITS A GOOD THING, WHILE OTHERS THINK IT IS BAD… DISCUSS BOTH THESE VIEWS AND WRITE YOUR OPINION v.2

SCIENCE ADVANCED SO MUCH THAT IT CAN NOW MAKE IT POSSIBLE FOR PEOPLE TO LIVE 100 YEARS OR EVEN 200 YEARS. SOME PEOPLE THINK ITS A GOOD THING, WHILE OTHERS THINK IT IS BAD… 2
With the advancement in scientific researches, people life span has increased in last few decades. It is often debated that the rise in living has significant advantages to the human being while others argue that its consequences are more harmful to the society and the nation. Firstly, the essay will shed light on outcomes of long living age and later will discuss results of limited lifespan followed by relevant examples. Nowadays, medical researches have proven that human lifespan can increase up to 100 years. Human beings want to live long to achieve their goals and to be successful in life along with desire to reside with many generations of their family. Moreover, there will be improvement in living standards as people grow older. Therefore, some people find medical science helpful to stay fit and healthy. For examples, medical treatments have made this possible to cure several diseases such as cancer, tumour, obesities which earlier was difficult. On the other hand, people believe that with the longest life cycle, overpopulation will increase tremendously which will cause various problems. With the rise in population, not only resource consumption will increase, but also there will be lack of employment opportunities. Additional problems can be environmental degradation which will impact natural resources and living beings. To illustrate, as existence increases more and more resources such as land, water, fuels will be required to fulfil the needs. To conclude, in my opinion, I believe that long life period will have several demerits to the individual and society. Therefore, increasing lifetime with the help of medical support is detrimental for people. In additions, the benefits of living more is overpowered by the advantages of living without medical assistance to live long.
With the advancement in scientific researches,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
span has increased in last few decades. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
debated that the rise in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
has significant advantages to the human being while others argue that its consequences are more harmful to the society and the nation.
Firstly
, the essay will shed light on outcomes of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
age and later will discuss results of limited lifespan followed by relevant examples.

Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
researches have proven that human lifespan can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
up to 100 years. Human beings want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
to achieve their goals and to be successful in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
along with desire to reside with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
generations of their family.
Moreover
, there will be improvement in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
standards as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
grow older.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
find
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
science helpful to stay fit and healthy. For examples,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
treatments have made this possible to cure several diseases such as cancer,
Possible spelling mistake. 'tumour' is British English.
tumour
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
obesities
which earlier was difficult.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that with the longest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
cycle, overpopulation will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
tremendously
which will cause various problems. With the rise in population, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
resource consumption will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
there will be lack of employment opportunities. Additional problems can be environmental degradation which will impact natural resources and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
beings. To illustrate, as existence
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increases
more and more resources such as land, water, fuels will
be required
to fulfil the needs.

To conclude
, in my opinion, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
period will have several demerits to the individual and society.
Therefore
, increasing lifetime with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
support is detrimental for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. In additions, the benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
more
is overpowered
by the advantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
assistance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay SCIENCE ADVANCED SO MUCH THAT IT CAN NOW MAKE IT POSSIBLE FOR PEOPLE TO LIVE 100 YEARS OR EVEN 200 YEARS. SOME PEOPLE THINK ITS A GOOD THING, WHILE OTHERS THINK IT IS BAD… 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
285 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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