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Recently published figures show that the wildlife population around the world has decreased by around 50% over the last 50 years what can we do to protect the wildlife around the world? v.1

Recently published figures show that the wildlife population around the world has decreased by around 50% over the last 50 years what can we do to protect the wildlife around the world? v. 1
Undoubtedly, a massive growth in the number of extinction of wild animals and species has been seen in the past few decades. The information provided in latest released figures expresses this decrease up to the half of the populace. Some of the preventive measures to tackle with this alarming issue are discussed in the further paragraphs. To begin, with the fact that the deforestation is the major reason of this phenomena. It has been noted, evidently, that major cities and towns are abandoning the forests provide housing and infrastructure, the body gets adversely affected and the society began to diminish at the Rapid speed. Most tropical areas of Arizona, for instance, have been demolished due to shortage of space for industries and Housing in the Cities. Consequently, reducing this notion could help to retain the living generation. Furthermore, preventing excessive hunting and brutal killing of wild animals can be the another step to protect the body. Psycho Hunters have an addiction to collect the heads of wild animals and have on the walls of their houses to show the heroine image in front of the guest this consequently destroys the living state and slowly extent the whole species therefore government must band brutal hunting around the world to control this ever increasing problem. Additionally, Introducing national parks project and building survival sanctuaries near the forest and major areas of tropical countries can be a good step towards the white species, for example, the United States has constructed a preserving botanicals century Around The Wild areas of the country to conserve the rare plants eventually establishing an initiative towards this problematic area is necessary. In conclusion, it can be reiterated that preservation of body society is quite vital for the natural habitat producing deforestation, hunting, killing of animals implementing government steps can be a good approach to elevate that terrifying situation.
Undoubtedly
, a massive growth in the number of extinction of wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and species has been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in the past few decades. The information provided in latest released figures expresses this decrease up to the half of the populace.
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
Some of the
preventive measures to tackle with this alarming issue
are discussed
in the
further
paragraphs.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
, with the fact that the deforestation is the major reason of
Did you mean "these"?
this
phenomena. It has
been noted
,
evidently
, that major cities and towns are abandoning the forests provide housing and infrastructure, the body
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
adversely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
and the society began to diminish at the Rapid speed. Most tropical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
of Arizona,
for instance
, have
been demolished
due to shortage of space for industries and Housing in the Cities.
Consequently
, reducing this notion could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to retain the living generation.

Furthermore
, preventing excessive hunting and brutal killing of wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
can be the another step to protect the body. Psycho Hunters have an addiction to collect the heads of wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and have on the walls of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
the
Possibly confused word: Did you mean "heroin" (= highly addictive narcotic) instead of 'heroine' (= the chief female character; a woman admired for great deeds)?
heroine
image in front of the guest this
consequently
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroys
the living state and
slowly
extent the whole species
therefore
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
band brutal hunting around the world to control this
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
ever increasing
problem.

Additionally
, Introducing national parks project and building survival sanctuaries near the forest and major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
of tropical countries can be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
step towards the white species,
for example
, the United States has constructed a preserving
Possible spelling mistake found.
botanicals
century Around The Wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
of the country to conserve the rare plants
eventually
establishing an initiative towards this problematic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
is necessary.

In conclusion
, it can
be reiterated
that preservation of body society is quite vital for the natural habitat producing deforestation, hunting, killing of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
implementing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
steps can be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
approach to elevate that terrifying situation.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Recently published figures show that the wildlife population around the world has decreased by around 50% over the last 50 years what can we do to protect the wildlife around the world? v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
310 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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