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Question 6 Advertising strategies. Using the examples from the talk, explain how persuasive strategies are used in advertising. v.1

Question 6 Advertising strategies. Using the examples from the talk, explain how persuasive strategies are used in advertising. v. 1
People are divided in their opinion concerning the upsurge of people earning a living from their houses instead of an office. Some consider this trend beneficial to job holders and their family members. Whereas others are of the opinion that this poses negative effects on their households. This essay agrees that working from home is of positive impacts on workers and their families hence, this essay will discuss both views. Apparently, some people believe that operating from a home office is advantageous to workers and households because it fosters family bonding. The reason for this is that family members are always available to interact, help and support each other; therefore, unifying family members. This is exemplified by a research conducted in 2012 by a graduate of sociology in Harvard University on factors that influences family bonding; thus, showed that working from home is a significant factor. Another point to consider is that it is convenient for people to work from home rather than from the office. In other words, this eliminates the stress of meeting up with stringent work schedules; thereby, giving them the opportunity to work at a flexible pace. To illustrate, in 2017, it was reported by the Vanguard Newspaper that people who work from home do that at their convenience. Proponents of the above view are of the belief that earning a living from home has adverse impacts on the family; firstly they believe this results to a bridge in the family privacy. This is because the work is situated in the house; consequently, clients frequent visit for official purposes can infringe on family's private time. In addition, people who work from home do not have a definite closing time. For example, people whose workplace is at home exceeds normal working hours to meet up with customer's demands. In summary, despite the cons of home based office such as privacy infringement and no definite closing time. In my opinion, the pros of working from home which are Woking at a convenient time and unity in the family are benefiting to the family and workers respectively
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are divided
in their opinion concerning the upsurge of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
earning a living from their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
instead
of an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
consider this trend beneficial to job holders and their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members.
“Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Whereas
others are of the opinion that this poses
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects on their households. This essay
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
from home is of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impacts on workers and their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
hence
, this essay will discuss both views.

Apparently
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that operating from a home
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
is advantageous to workers and households
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it fosters
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
bonding.
The reason for this is
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members are always available to interact,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
and support each other;
therefore
, unifying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members. This
is exemplified
by
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "research".
a research
conducted in 2012 by a graduate of sociology in Harvard University on factors that influences
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
bonding;
thus
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
from home is a significant factor.

Another point to consider is that it is convenient for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from home
rather
than from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
.
In other words
, this eliminates the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
of meeting up with stringent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
schedules; thereby, giving them the opportunity to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
at a flexible pace. To illustrate, in 2017, it
was reported
by the Vanguard Newspaper that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from home do that at their convenience.

Proponents of the above view are of the belief that earning a living from home has adverse impacts on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
;
firstly
they believe this results to a bridge in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
privacy. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is situated
in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
;
consequently
, clients frequent visit for official purposes can infringe on family's private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from home do not have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
definite
closing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
whose workplace is at home exceeds normal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
hours to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
up with customer's demands.

In summary, despite the cons of home based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
such as privacy infringement and no
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
definite
closing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. In my opinion, the pros of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
from home which are
Possible spelling mistake found.
Woking
at a convenient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and unity in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
are benefiting to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and workers
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
respectively
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Learn a language, and you’ll avoid a war.
Arab Proverb

IELTS essay Question 6 Advertising strategies. Using the examples from the talk, explain how persuasive strategies are used in advertising. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
347 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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