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TPO 40 - Question 6Using points and examples from the lecture, explain two strategies salespeople use to address customer concerns. v.1

TPO 40 - Question 6Using points and examples from the lecture, explain two strategies salespeople use to address customer concerns. v. 1
Climate change is among the principal dangers facing people this century and ocean levels are increasing dramatically. This essay will first suggest that the biggest problem caused by this phenomenon is the flooding of homes and then submit a building flood protection as the most viable solution. The foremost problem caused by sea levels creeping up is the flooding of peoples’ residences. Millions of people all over the world live in coastal areas and if the sea rises by even a few feet, they will be inundated with water and lose their property. Shelter is one of the most basic of human needs and widespread flooding would cause millions of people to become homeless, not to mention losing all of their possessions. The devastation brought about by this was clear for all to see during the 2011 Tsunami in Japan, in which millions of people were displaced. A possible solution to this problem would be to build flood barriers. Flood defences, such as dikes, dams and floodgates, could be built along coasts and waterways, thereby stopping the water reaching populated areas. The Netherlands is one of the most populated areas in the world and also one of the most vulnerable to flooding and they have successfully employed various flood defence systems. To conclude, stemming the rising tides caused by increasing global temperatures is one of the foremost challenges we face and it will ultimately lead to many of the worlds’ cities being left underwater, but a possible solution could be to utilise the flood prevention techniques already used by countries like Holland. It is predicted that more and more countries will be forced to take such measures to avoid a watery catastrophe.
Climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
is among the principal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
dangers
facing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
this century and ocean levels are increasing
dramatically
. This essay will
first
suggest that the biggest problem caused by this phenomenon is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
flooding
of homes and then submit a building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
flood
protection as the most viable solution.

The foremost problem caused by sea levels creeping up is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
flooding
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peoples’
residences. Millions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
all over the world
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in coastal areas and if the sea rises by even a few feet, they will
be inundated
with water and lose their property. Shelter is one of the most basic of human needs and widespread
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
flooding
would cause millions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to become homeless, not to mention losing all of their possessions. The devastation brought about by this was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
for all to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
during the 2011 Tsunami in Japan, in which millions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
were displaced
.

A possible solution to this problem would be to build
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
flood
barriers.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Flood
Possible spelling mistake. 'defences' is British English.
defences
, such as dikes, dams and floodgates, could
be built
along coasts and waterways, thereby stopping the water reaching populated areas. The Netherlands is one of the most populated areas in the world and
also
one of the most vulnerable to
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
flooding and
they have
successfully
employed various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
flood
Possible spelling mistake. 'defence' is British English.
defence
systems.

To conclude
, stemming the rising tides caused by increasing global temperatures is one of the foremost challenges we face and it will
ultimately
lead to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of the worlds’ cities being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
underwater,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
a possible solution could be to
Possible spelling mistake. 'utilise' is British English.
utilise
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
flood
prevention techniques already
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by countries like Holland. It
is predicted
that more and more countries will
be forced
to take such measures to avoid a watery catastrophe.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay TPO 40 - Question 6Using points and examples from the lecture, explain two strategies salespeople use to address customer concerns. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
282 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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