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Q5 The speakers discuss two possible solutions to the woman’s problem. Describe the problem and the two solutions. Then explain what you think the woman should do and why. v.1

Q5 The speakers discuss two possible solutions to the woman’s problem. Describe the problem and the two solutions. Then explain what you think the woman should do and why. v. 1
People have different views about whether the national authorities should invest in supporting art and cultural works. While some argue it is a waste of money and there are other concerns that should be financed, I would believe that this investment is advantageous for the society. On the one hand, there is little doubt that there is a variety of issues which need funding from government. The first obvious concern is the education system. The reason is that education plays a significant role in the development of a country. To be more specific, the large number of well-informed and educated citizens can make a great contribution to the nation's workforce, which would definitely develop the national economy. Another issue that needs investing is the environment. In many areas, the pollution is relatively serious due to the emissions from a large number of cars which are in used and a huge amount of waste that is discharged into the environment by factories. As a result, government funding should be used to address these problems. On the other hand, in my opinion, investing in art and culture brings numerous benefits for the population and the society. It is undeniable that many types of works of arts could significantly contribute to improving people's mental health. For example, music and movies are able to help individuals relax and refresh their minds after a long day working hard. In addition, various cultural traditions and beliefs which have been passed down from generation to generation should be supported. This is because they can make citizens feel a sense of identity and promote the national pride and patriotism. Therefore, it is necessary for authorities to allocate resources in supporting art and culture. In conclusion, while I agree that the national budget should be used for developing the education and tackling the environmental issues, I firmly believe that the investment for promoting art and culture should not be overlooked because of its merits for people and the community.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
views about whether the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
authorities should invest in supporting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
and cultural works. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
argue it is a waste of money and there are other concerns that should
be financed
, I would believe that this investment is advantageous for the society.

On the one hand, there is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
doubt that there is a variety of issues which need funding from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
. The
first
obvious concern is the education system. The reason is that education plays a significant role in the development of a country. To be more specific, the large number of well-informed and educated citizens can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a great contribution to the nation's workforce, which would definitely develop the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
economy. Another issue that needs investing is the environment. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
areas, the pollution is
relatively
serious due to the emissions from
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
a large number of
cars which are in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
and a huge amount of waste that
is discharged
into the environment by factories.
As a result
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
funding should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to address these problems.

On the other hand
, in my opinion, investing in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
and culture brings numerous benefits for the population and the society. It is undeniable that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
types of works of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
could
significantly
contribute to improving
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's mental health.
For example
, music and movies are able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
individuals relax and refresh their minds after a long day working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
.
In addition
, various cultural traditions and beliefs which have
been passed
down from generation to generation should
be supported
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
citizens feel a sense of identity and promote the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
pride and patriotism.
Therefore
, it is necessary for authorities to allocate resources in supporting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
and culture.

In conclusion
, while I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
budget should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for developing the education and tackling the environmental issues, I
firmly
believe that the investment for promoting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
and culture should not
be overlooked
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of its merits for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and the community.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
A different language is a different vision of life.
Federico Fellini

IELTS essay Q5 The speakers discuss two possible solutions to the woman’s problem. Describe the problem and the two solutions. Then explain what you think the woman should do and why. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
330 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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