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Q= Having police officer patrolling the streets is often considered an essential way to reduce crime. How effective do you think police Street patrolling are? What other ways to reduce crime can you purpose? v.1

Q= Having police officer patrolling the streets is often considered an essential way to reduce crime. How effective do you think police Street patrolling are? What other ways to reduce crime can you purpose? v. 1
Police officers patrolling has been the epicentre of discussion and a unanimous conclusive agreement is yet to be achieved. However, to restrict offenders to crime is best method patrolling of the street. From my prospective, street patrolling is an effective method. In this essay, I will discuss about benefits of police street patrolling, and the supplementary method to reduce crime. To begin with, police, street Petrolling would reduce the various crimes especially at dangerous Streets. Thus, in most of the cities, there are various Street, where thief were standing to rob the people, while patrolling have a detrimental effect on offenders. Owing to which thief did not stand there because of the police. Moreover, they caught many criminals who break the law, consequently that leads to reduce violence around the area. The second most convincing side is, there are other various effective method to plunge crime. Firstly, to install the CCTV cameras on the streets. After that, if anyone does unethical activities, then it is easy caught that person with the help of cameras. Furthermore, government must to pass a strict rule to restrict people to commit crime for the first time because of fear of the law. Also, prison must give strict punishment, afterwards they do not crime again. In conclusion, those facts which discussed above, I would therefore argue that although police street track is a prime way to reduce crime; however, another method is also beneficial. Whereas, government must take serious action on criminal to drop the crime in the area.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Police
officers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patrolling
has been the
Possible spelling mistake. 'epicentre' is British English.
epicentre
of discussion and a unanimous conclusive agreement is
yet
to
be achieved
.
However
, to restrict offenders to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
A determiner is probably missing here: "is the best".
is best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
method
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patrolling
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
street
. From my prospective,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
street
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patrolling
is an effective
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
method
. In this essay, I will
Did you mean simply "discuss benefits"? You do not need the word "about" here.
discuss about benefits
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
police
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
street
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patrolling
, and the supplementary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
method
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
crime.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
police
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
street
Possible spelling mistake found.
Petrolling
would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
the various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
especially
at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Streets
.
Thus
, in most of the cities, there are various
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "streets"?
Street
, where thief were standing to rob the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patrolling
have a detrimental effect on offenders. Owing to which thief did not stand there
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
police
.
Moreover
, they caught
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
criminals who break the law,
consequently
that leads to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
violence around the area.

The second most convincing side is, there are other various effective
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
method
to plunge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
Firstly
, to install the CCTV cameras on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
streets
. After that, if anyone does unethical activities, then it is easy caught that person with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of cameras.
Furthermore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
After 'must', the verb is used without 'to'. Probably, you should use "must" or "have to" here.
must to
pass a strict
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
to restrict
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to commit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
for the
first
time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of fear of the law.
Also
, prison
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
give strict punishment, afterwards they do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
again.

In conclusion
, those facts which discussed above, I would
therefore
argue that although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
police
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
street
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
track
is a prime way to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
;
however
, another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
method
is
also
beneficial.
“Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Whereas
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
take serious action on criminal to drop the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
in the area.
16Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
34Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Language is the blood of the soul into which thoughts run and out of which they grow.
Oliver Wendell Holmes

IELTS essay Q= Having police officer patrolling the streets is often considered an essential way to reduce crime. How effective do you think police Street patrolling are? What other ways to reduce crime can you purpose? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
254 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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