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Prison is the common way in most countries to solve the problem of crime. However, a more effective solution is to provide people a better education. Don you agree ordisagree. v.12

Prison is the common way in most countries to solve the problem of crime. However, a more effective solution is to provide people a better education. Don you agree ordisagree. v. 12
People have different views about the most effective way to reduce crime. While I agree that prison can be a good solution, I wouldargue that it is much better for governments to educate citizens in order to minimise the problem of crime. On the one hand, I accept that prison is a necessary measure to help governments deal with crime. Firstly, this is an effective method of punishing criminals. For example, those who commit murders in many countries might have to face a life sentence. As a result, people would be afraid of these severe punishments and are therefore less likely to offend. Secondly, when offenders are kept in jail, they cannot get out and interact with others in society. This prevents them from committing more crimes, which helps to guarantee safety for all citizens. If dangerous criminals are not sent to prison, this might be a great threat for other people. On the other hand, I believe giving education for citizens is a much better solution to minimise the problem of crime. The first reason is that many crimes occur due to a lack of awareness. For instance, many people do not know that it is illegal to have sex with a teenager who is less than 16 years old. Therefore, it is important to educate individuals about law, which can help them to avoid making mistakes. Additionally, when people are properly educated, they can have sufficient knowledge and skills needed to get jobs and support themselves. This is likely to lead to a reduction in several types of crime such as robberies or burglaries. In conclusion, while it is true that prison is a good way to prevent crime, I believe that education is a more effective method that should be adopted.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
views about the most effective way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
. While I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
can be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
solution, I
Possible spelling mistake found.
wouldargue
that it is much better for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
to educate citizens in order to
Possible spelling mistake. 'minimise' is British English.
minimise
the problem of crime.

On the one hand, I accept that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
is a necessary measure to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
deal with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
Firstly
, this is an effective method of punishing criminals.
For example
, those who commit murders in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries might
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
face a life sentence.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would be afraid of these severe punishments and are
therefore
less likely to offend.
Secondly
, when offenders are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
in jail, they cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
out and interact with others in society. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevents
them from committing more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to guarantee safety for all citizens. If
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
criminals are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
, this might be a great threat for other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

On the other hand
, I believe giving education for citizens is a much better solution to
Possible spelling mistake. 'minimise' is British English.
minimise
the problem of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
. The
first
reason is that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
occur due to a lack of awareness.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not know that it is illegal to have sex with a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenager
who is less than 16 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
.
Therefore
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to educate individuals about law, which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to avoid making mistakes.
Additionally
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
properly
educated, they can have sufficient knowledge and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
needed to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
jobs and support themselves. This is likely to lead to a reduction in several types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
such as robberies or burglaries.

In conclusion
, while it is true that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
, I believe that education is a more effective method that should
be adopted
.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Prison is the common way in most countries to solve the problem of crime. However, a more effective solution is to provide people a better education. Don you agree ordisagree. v. 12

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
294 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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