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People sleep less than before in many countries. Why do people sleep less? What effect does it have on an individually and on society? v.22

People sleep less than before in many countries. Why do people sleep less? What effect does it have on an individually and on society? v. 22
The people of today sleep less compared to the past. The main reason for this trend is that people spend most of their time on digital tools. Lack of sleep leads to sleep problems and drowsy driving, which is a major problem in many countries. The people of today suffer from sleep problems due to several causes and these problems also come with society-related problems. Reasons why we’re not getting enough sleep abound, but one of the biggest changes behind the sleep decline is the availability of electricity and technological advances that allow us to work and play 24/7. For example, using computers and phones for playing interactive games and social networking can activate and excite the brain, making it harder to fall asleep. As a consequence, people are lack of sleep. Although insufficient sleep is thought as a waste of time, it causes severe consequences such as insomnia, sleep deprivation, poor sleep. Researchers estimate that more than 70 million Americans suffer from a sleep disorder. In addition, sleepiness is a major cause of traffic accidents. It can impair (zayıflatmak) driving performance as much or more so than alcohol, studies show. According to official statistics, sleepiness is a contributing factor in up to 30% of traffic accidents. As a result of this, bedtimes have become later, but wake times have not. The result is a sleep-deprived society. In conclusion, many people do not care about to sleep more time anymore. The attractive nature of the online world today is keeping people awake today and it leads a decline in the sleep duration of people. The sleep decline affects both the mental and the efficiency of driving performance and result in a sleep-deprived society.
The
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people
of
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today
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sleep
less compared to the past. The main reason for this trend is that
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people
spend most of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on digital tools. Lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
leads to
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sleep
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problems
and drowsy driving, which is a major
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problem
in
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many
countries.

The
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people
of
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today
suffer from
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sleep
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problems
due to several causes and these
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problems
also
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come
with society-related
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problems
. Reasons why we’re not getting
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enough
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sleep
abound,
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but
one of the biggest
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changes
behind the
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sleep
decline is the availability of electricity and technological advances that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
us to work and play 24/7.
For example
, using computers and phones for playing interactive games and social networking can activate and excite the brain, making it harder to fall asleep. As a consequence,
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people
are lack of sleep.

Although insufficient
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sleep
is
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thought
as a waste of
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time
, it causes severe consequences such as insomnia,
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sleep
deprivation, poor
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sleep
. Researchers estimate that more than 70 million Americans suffer from a
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sleep
disorder.
In addition
, sleepiness is a major cause of traffic accidents. It can impair (
Possible spelling mistake found.
zayıflatmak
) driving performance as much or more
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so
than alcohol, studies
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show
. According to official statistics, sleepiness is a contributing factor in up to 30% of traffic accidents.
As a result
of this, bedtimes have become later,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
wake
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times
have not. The result is a sleep-deprived society.

In conclusion
,
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many
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people
do not care about to
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sleep
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
anymore. The attractive nature of the online world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
today
is keeping
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people
awake
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today
and it leads a decline in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
duration of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
decline affects both the mental and the efficiency of driving performance and result in a sleep-deprived society.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay People sleep less than before in many countries. Why do people sleep less? What effect does it have on an individually and on society? v. 22

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
283 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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