Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

People sleep less than before in many countries. Why do people sleep less? What effect does it have on an individually and on society? v.9

People sleep less than before in many countries. Why do people sleep less? What effect does it have on an individually and on society? v. 9
Nowadays, sleeping patterns of people have changed significantly over the yeards. It is generally considered that the increasing rate of stress that people are these days facing is a major factor of the reason people is sleeping less than their ancestors. Hence, it is causing a major impact not only on a personal level, but also on the society. To begin with, the competition and the hectic lifestyle of the modern society requires from people to be more attentive and aggressive than before. In other words, people of this generation feel pressured and are in a constant race with time to fulfill their basic needs in addition to achieve their personal and career goals. It is therefore thought that not sleeping will give them more time. For instance, Orient News published a recent statistic showing that 20 percent more adults aging between 28 and 35 bring their work to home, which result to sleeping less. However, this phenomenon has serious consequences on the well-being health and the community. To state this fact in different words, to be deprived from sleep or not having enough sleep may lead to severe heath problems such as cardiovascular diseases, diabetes, and high blood pressure. Also, lack of sleeping can cause mental problems especially depression. Consequently, all of these physical and mental disorders will gradually effect the economy negatively. In conclusion, to maintain a healthy lifestyle and to be more productive in a society people should learn how to balance their work life, ambitions and personal life.
Nowadays,
sleeping
patterns of
people
have
changed
significantly
over the
yeards
. It is
generally
considered that the increasing rate of
stress
that
people
are these days facing is a major factor of the reason
people
is
sleeping
less than their ancestors.
Hence
, it is causing a major impact not
only
on a personal level,
but
also
on the society.

To
begin
with, the competition and the hectic lifestyle of the modern society requires from
people
to be more attentive and aggressive than
before
.
In other words
,
people
of this generation feel pressured and are in a constant race with time to fulfill their basic needs
in addition
to achieve their personal and career goals. It is
therefore
thought
that not
sleeping
will give them more time.
For instance
, Orient News published a recent statistic showing that 20 percent more adults aging between 28 and 35 bring their work to home, which result to
sleeping
less.

However
, this phenomenon has serious consequences on the well-being health and the community. To state this fact in
different
words, to be
deprived from
sleep or not having
enough
sleep may lead to severe heath problems such as cardiovascular diseases, diabetes, and high blood pressure.
Also
, lack of
sleeping
can cause mental problems
especially
depression.
Consequently
, all of these physical and mental disorders will
gradually
effect
the economy
negatively
.

In conclusion
, to maintain a healthy lifestyle and to be more productive in a society
people
should learn how to balance their work life, ambitions and personal life.
18Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
11Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay People sleep less than before in many countries. Why do people sleep less? What effect does it have on an individually and on society? v. 9

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
252 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts