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People have to spend more and more time to travel their homes for jobs and study. What are the reasons? How can wo solve this problem? v.1

People have to spend more and more time to travel their homes for jobs and study. What are the reasons? How can wo solve this problem? v. 1
Nowadays, individuals want to purchase their own vehicles because they like to travel in their personal vehicles such as car, bike and many more. They use these vehicles for going to jobs and other purposes and expended more time to travel. I will explain the causes as well as solutions of this problem in the further paragraphs. To begin with, the first reason of this problem is traffic. People prefer to travel in their own vehicles, so it leads traffic on roads. For instance, in recent years, a number of people spend their money for buying personal vehicles and travel in their vehicles. For that reason, day by day traffic is increasing on the roads so, people spend their more time to travel. Moreover, people can travel on public transportation as well as they prefer to travel whole family in their own vehicles. Thus, traffic is reduced on the roads and people cannot be expend their more time to travel. Moving further to the second cause of this problem is the condition of public transportation. In the modern era, people cannot like to wait for buses and trains, so they do not travel in public transportation have their fixed time that is why people wait more to travel. For that reason, everyone prefers to travel in their own vehicles. Therefore, government should be improved public transportation and increase vehicles for public transportation as well as reduce the amount of travel in public transportation and increased the amount of petrol and diesel. So, people can travel on public transportation and cannot be spent their huge time to travel. To conclude, people use their own vehicles for their crucial purpose like going to hospitals and other personal issues. Also, the government should be improved public transportation.
Nowadays, individuals want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they like to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
in their personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
such as car, bike and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
for going to jobs and other purposes and expended more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
. I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
the causes
as well
as solutions of this problem in the
further
paragraphs.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the
first
reason of this problem is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
prefer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it leads
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
on roads.
For instance
, in recent years, a number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
spend their money for buying personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
. For that reason, day by day
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
is increasing on the roads
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
spend their more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
as well
as they prefer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
whole family in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
on the roads and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
cannot be
Consider using the past participle "expended"?
expend
their more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to travel.

Moving
further
to the second cause of this problem is the condition of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
. In the modern era,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
cannot like to wait for buses and trains,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
that is
why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
wait more to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
. For that reason, everyone prefers to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
and increase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
as well
as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
and increased the amount of petrol and diesel.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
and cannot
be spent
their huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to travel.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
for their crucial purpose like going to hospitals and other personal issues.
Also
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
.
16Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
56Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay People have to spend more and more time to travel their homes for jobs and study. What are the reasons? How can wo solve this problem? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
294 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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