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People have little understanding of the importance of the natural world, what are the reasons and how can people learn more about the natural world? v.1

People have little understanding of the importance of the natural world, what are the reasons and how can people learn more about the natural world? v. 1
It is true that many people do not realize the functions of our nature. I analyze this problem in several ways and also provide some steps to ease it. There are several reasons for individuals being unfamiliar with the meaning of the natural world. For starters, a large proportion of people are currently living in the cities, where most of places are modern buildings rather than natural sceneries. Some of them may think that the nature plays a negligible role in our lives. Another reason is that people are sometimes busy with study or work, and spend less time on caring the planet. As a result, it is difficult for them to understand the importance of the natural world. Based on the above analysis, I suggest several practical measures to improve their awareness of nature. As for governments, they should run campaigns to encourage us to know more about the importance of the earth. For example, they could publish some non-commercial ads on TV or the Internet to show what our life would be if we lose the nature. From the perspective of education systems, students should gain better knowledge of the nature, for example, plants can produce oxygen and absorb carbon dioxide. In this way, they are likely to pay attention to our natural world as well as protect it. Finally, parents could visit natural sceneries during family trips to know more about their benefits. In conclusion, although there are numerous reasons for our lack of the importance of the natural world, I believe that we could tackle this problem with the support of governments and education systems, as well as human beings.
It is true that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
do not realize the functions of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
. I analyze this problem in several ways and
also
provide
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
steps to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
it.

There are several reasons for individuals being unfamiliar with the meaning of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
world. For starters, a large proportion of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
currently
living in the cities, where
After 'most of', you should use 'the' ("most of the places") or simply say "most places".
most of places
are modern buildings
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
sceneries.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
of them may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
plays a negligible role in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. Another reason is that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
busy with study or work, and spend less time on caring the planet.
As a result
, it is difficult for them to understand the importance of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
world.

Based on the above analysis, I suggest several practical measures to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their awareness of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
. As for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
, they should run campaigns to encourage us to know more about the importance of the earth.
For example
, they could publish
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
non-commercial ads on TV or the Internet to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
what our life would be if we lose the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
. From the perspective of education systems, students should gain better knowledge of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
,
for example
, plants can produce oxygen and absorb carbon dioxide. In this way, they are likely to pay attention to our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
world
as well
as protect it.
Finally
, parents could visit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
sceneries during family trips to know more about their benefits.

In conclusion
, although there are numerous reasons for our lack of the importance of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
world, I believe that we could tackle this problem with the support of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
and education systems,
as well
as human beings.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
11Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay People have little understanding of the importance of the natural world, what are the reasons and how can people learn more about the natural world? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
274 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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