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People cart eat a wide variety of food that can be grown in other areas. As a result, people eat more food produced in other regions than local food Do you think the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages? v.1

People cart eat a wide variety of food that can be grown in other areas. As a result, people eat more food produced in other regions than local food Do you think the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1
Nowadays, There are wide variety of options of consuming foods planted in diffirent areas, resulting increased number of usage of foriegn dishes than local cuisine. I will consider both sides of pros and cons of this trend followed by reasonable conclusion including my own point of view. First of all, eating imported food can be great opportunity to understand the culture of abroad nation is one of its benefits. Therefore, those who do not have enough budget to vizit the area that are willing to can take it as a hint for their future traveling. Furthermore, some of the food plants used for medicine can be found in only the specific area. Therefore, especially those who are suffering from disease are take enormous advantagous from imported medicine. Besides, consuming similar food is making us more easy to pace up with the changing world. Secondly, declines of traditional cuisine's production is one of its drawbacks. As a result of this trend, the indication of nations can be detoriarated since food is the one of significant factors of the every culture. Moreover, increased availability of food involving junk food, sugary drinks is presenting side effects on human health such as obesity, overweight and diabites. Considering the last evidence from WHO, the number of adolescents who are obese are continiously increasing result of the worldwide trend of unhealthy food consumption. Besides, the quality of production can be decreased during the way of transportation. To sum up, Although, it is difficult to weigh the advantages and disadvantages of current trend, I personally believe that the drawbacks are outnumbering the benefits since side effect of human health is getting higher with regards to this change.
Nowadays, There are wide variety of options of consuming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
planted in
Possible spelling mistake found.
diffirent
areas, resulting increased number of usage of
Possible spelling mistake found.
foriegn
dishes than local cuisine. I will consider both sides of pros and cons of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
followed by reasonable conclusion including my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
point of view.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, eating imported
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
can be great opportunity to understand the culture of abroad nation is one of its benefits.
Therefore
, those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
do not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
budget to
Possible spelling mistake found.
vizit
the area that are willing to can take it as a hint for their future traveling.
Furthermore
,
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
plants
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for medicine can
be found
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the specific area.
Therefore
,
especially
those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are suffering from disease are take enormous
Possible spelling mistake found.
advantagous
from imported medicine.
Besides
, consuming similar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is making us more easy to pace up with the changing world.

Secondly
, declines of traditional cuisine's production is one of its drawbacks.
As a result
of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
, the indication of nations can be
Possible spelling mistake found.
detoriarated
since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is the one of significant factors of the every culture.
Moreover
, increased availability of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
involving junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
, sugary drinks is presenting side effects on human health such as obesity, overweight and
Possible spelling mistake found.
diabites
. Considering the last evidence from
Did you mean "whom"?
WHO
, the number of adolescents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are obese are
Possible spelling mistake found.
continiously
increasing result of the worldwide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
of unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
consumption.
Besides
, the quality of production can
be decreased
during the way of transportation.

To sum up, Although, it is difficult to weigh the advantages and disadvantages of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
, I
personally
believe that the drawbacks are outnumbering the benefits since side effect of human health is getting higher
Use "in regard to", "with regard to", or more simply "regarding".
with regards to
this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
16Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Mistakes
Language is not a genetic gift, it is a social gift. Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club – the community of speakers of that language.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay People cart eat a wide variety of food that can be grown in other areas. As a result, people eat more food produced in other regions than local food Do you think the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
280 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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