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People attend colleges or universities for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge). Why do you think people attend colleges or universities? v.14

People attend colleges or universities for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge). Why do you think people attend colleges or universities? v. 14
It is true that educational institutions such as colleges and universities help people to achieve new experiences, higher knowledge and for career preparation. From my point of view, people must go to colleges or universities due to various reasons as follows. To begin with, this is the biggest opportunity for students to expose their talents in front of a large number of people. To be clear, after their school education with a limited audience, this is the next level. They get more exposure in front of a massive crowd. These experiences boost the person to develop his skills further. Moreover, such talented students can promote many beneficial activities for the welfare of the society. To explain, most of the people are easily being influenced by creative people. For example, nowadays, government depends on the creative artists to conduct awareness campaigns for the betterment of the society. As a result, people get useful information along with entertainment which enhances the overall development of the society. Furthermore, universities and colleges improve social skills to a great extent. These institutions give a lot of chances for people to interact with different kinds of people from various levels of social sectors. Therefore, communication skill can be increased efficiently which help for social interaction among members. These interactions make enable the person more productive for the country. For all these reasons, I strongly believe that people should attend colleges or universities without any doubt. In conclusion, educational institutions always support and encourage people to do positive things for themselves as well as for their country. So, all people have to complete their university degree or college education to have a better career and better contribution towards the society.
It is true that educational institutions such as colleges and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to achieve new experiences, higher knowledge and for career preparation. From my point of view,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
go to colleges or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
due to various reasons as follows.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, this is the biggest opportunity for students to expose their talents in front of
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
a large number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. To be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
, after their school education with a limited audience, this is the
next
level. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more exposure in front of a massive crowd. These experiences boost the person to develop his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
further
.
Moreover
, such talented students can promote
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
beneficial activities for the welfare of the society. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
easily
being influenced
by creative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
For example
, nowadays,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
depends on the creative artists to conduct awareness campaigns for the betterment of the society.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
useful information along with entertainment which enhances the
overall
development of the society.

Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
and colleges
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
to a great extent. These institutions give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
chances for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to interact with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from various levels of social sectors.
Therefore
, communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
can
be increased
efficiently
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
for social interaction among members. These interactions
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
enable the person more productive for the country. For all these reasons, I
strongly
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should attend colleges or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
without any doubt.

In conclusion
, educational institutions always support and encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
things for themselves
as well
as for their country.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
complete their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
degree or college education to have a better career and better contribution towards the society.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
16Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay People attend colleges or universities for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge). Why do you think people attend colleges or universities? v. 14

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
283 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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