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Part 1: What games are popular in your country? Do you play any games? How do people learn to play games in your country? Do you think it's important for people to play games? Part 2: Describe an open-air or street market which you enjoyed visiting. You sh v.1

Part 1: What games are popular in your country? Do you play any games? How do people learn to play games in your country? Do you think it's important for people to play games? Part 2: Describe an open-air or street market which you enjoyed visiting. You sh v. 1
In this technological era, the popularity of online shopping is growing rapidly. People from all age groups nowadays prefer using online applications and websites to buy or sell a lot of commodities. This essay will provide relevant examples to support the merits of online purchasing outnumbers its demerits. Firstly, In the recent years the awareness among individuals about internet and e-commerce usage has fairly grown. The strengths of online shopping are many and wide like- it allows people better pace management and save their money. For instance, the Internet is buying help me to order my groceries in short space, and I can use my spare time for other things. Yet, another advantage is it allows to compare the price of different brands together and choose after reviewing the ratings given by actual consumers. Thus, customers can choose budget friendly products with good quality. Secondly, it helps to eliminate the long queues and make the transaction easy. To exemplify, if you have to buy an air ticket, you don’t need to wait in log waiting lines till your turn comes, you just need to go to some websites or applications like- make my trip, Paytm, Yatra, Goibibo etc. And make your payment easily and get receipt too. On the other hand, it has some drawbacks too, Hacking of credit/debit credit card details are one of them. Person data sharing and fishing mails, these activities took place if the customer allows to use their private data to companies. It can be concluded that although online shopping has some disadvantages, but the level of comfort and satisfaction it renders to customers and allow them to save their time and money is totally worth.
In this technological era, the popularity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
shopping is growing
rapidly
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
from all age groups nowadays prefer using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
applications and websites to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
or sell
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
commodities. This essay will provide relevant examples to support the merits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
purchasing outnumbers its demerits.

Firstly
, In the recent years the awareness among individuals about internet and e-commerce usage has
fairly
grown. The strengths of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
shopping are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
and wide like- it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
allows
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
better pace management and save their money.
For instance
, the Internet is buying
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
me to order my groceries in short space, and I can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
my spare time for other things.
Yet
, another advantage is it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
allows
to compare the price of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
brands together and choose after reviewing the ratings
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
by actual consumers.
Thus
, customers can choose budget friendly products with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
quality.

Secondly
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to eliminate the long queues and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the transaction easy. To exemplify, if you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
an air ticket, you don’t need to wait in log waiting lines till your turn
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
, you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
need to go to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
websites or applications like-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
my trip,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Paytm
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Yatra
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Goibibo
etc. And
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
your payment
easily
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
receipt too.

On the other hand
, it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks too, Hacking of credit/debit credit card
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
are one of them. Person data sharing and fishing mails, these activities took place if the customer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
allows
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their private data to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
.

It can
be concluded
that although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
shopping has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the level of comfort and satisfaction it renders to customers and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
allow
them to save their time and money is
totally
worth.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Language is not a genetic gift, it is a social gift. Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club – the community of speakers of that language.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay Part 1: What games are popular in your country? Do you play any games? How do people learn to play games in your country? Do you think it's important for people to play games? Part 2: Describe an open-air or street market which you enjoyed visiting. You sh v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
281 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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