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Our personalities are predetermined as a result of our genes before we are born and there is nothing that can be done to alter our character traits. To what extent do you agree? v.1

Our personalities are predetermined as a result of our genes before we are born and there is nothing that can be done to alter our character traits. v. 1
It is often assumed that the genetic elements play a vital role in human nature which is defined prior to its birth and it is impossible to modify. To some extent, I do not agree with this statement because as per my viewpoint the person's identity is variable and not constant which differs as the person grows. First of all, each individual arrives in the world with certain distinct qualities which might be inherited by their parents and grandparents. So it is considered that it is arduous to alter the innate personality. For instance, it has been observed that kids behave the same way as their mother or father does and this might be the result of inheritance or imitation. On the other hand, it can be seen that personality varies as per the specific situation and environment. The circumstances have a major impact on human nature and tendency. The education centers are having a major role in developing the human personality. For example, many parents stated at the enrollment process of school as their kids are shy and it seems impossible to change this nature however the teacher took efforts to modify their behavior by training and teaching methods as they look more confident by participating in various competitions and public talks. To conclude, It is undeniable that a person grabs some characteristics from their peers by birth or imitation. But, I think the habits can be altered if the person grows in a positive environment and efforts are taken to change it wheres it might destroy the personality in the negative surrounding.
It is
often
assumed that the genetic elements play a vital role in human nature which
is defined
prior to its birth and it is impossible to modify. To
some
extent, I do not
agree
with this statement
because
as per my viewpoint the person's identity is variable and not constant which differs as the person grows.

First of all
, each individual arrives in the world with certain distinct qualities which might
be inherited
by their parents and grandparents.
So
it
is considered
that it is arduous to alter the innate
personality
.
For instance
, it has
been observed
that kids behave the same way as their mother or father does and this might be the result of inheritance or imitation.

On the other hand
, it can be
seen
that
personality
varies as per the specific situation and environment. The circumstances have a major impact on human nature and tendency. The education centers are having a major role in developing the human
personality
.
For example
,
many
parents stated at the enrollment process of school as their kids are shy and it seems impossible to
change
this nature
however
the teacher took efforts to modify their behavior by training and teaching methods as they look more confident by participating in various competitions and public talks.

To conclude
, It is undeniable that a person grabs
some
characteristics from their peers by birth or imitation.
But
, I
think
the habits can
be altered
if the person grows in a
positive
environment and efforts
are taken
to
change
it
wheres
it might
destroy
the
personality
in the
negative
surrounding.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Our personalities are predetermined as a result of our genes before we are born and there is nothing that can be done to alter our character traits. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
264 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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