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Only government action can solve housing shortages in big cities. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

Only government action can solve housing shortages in big cities. v. 1
Housing shortage has become a serious urban social issue in many parts of the world. It has been argued that only when the government has taken action, can demand for homes be fulfilled. Yet to the best of my knowledge, the government alone cannot cope well with the housing shortage. One of the main objections to government intervention is that it would hamper the private sector and simultaneously pose a huge burden upon the state. In countries where the government is on a tight budget and the homeless population is large, the involvement of private property developers is required and recommended. Not only does it release the government from the burden of funding large-sized construction programmes, but it also fosters the housing industry. Given its role in attracting public consumption and accelerating economic development, the housing industry should be at the mercy of the market, rather than the government. Another drawback of state control over the housing market is that it could result in the stagnancy of construction quality, functionality, facilities and other aspects of housing. Apartment blocks or other residential constructions would be built in a similar pattern and the cityscape would be monotonous. Excessive uniformity, especially in the size and number of rooms, will fail to meet the comprehensive requirements raised by citizens on properties. Despite these objections, government intervention is essential in some segments of the market and can render more resistance to citizens. Single parents, the people with disabilities and other disadvantaged people are among those who are not ready to afford commercial housing. The government can provide them either with a housing allowance to purchase their private properties or directly with economical houses. As indicated above, in addressing homelessness and inadequate housing, the joint effort of both government and private sector is required. While government intervention would impede the property market and negatively influence the supply and demand relationship, government assistance is essential for low-income families and vulnerable individuals in need of housing.
Housing shortage has become a serious urban social issue in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
parts of the world. It has
been argued
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
when the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
has taken action, can demand for homes
be fulfilled
.
Yet
to the best of my knowledge, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
alone cannot cope well with the housing shortage.

One of the main objections to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
intervention is that it would hamper the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
sector and
simultaneously
pose a huge burden upon the state. In countries where the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is on a tight budget and the homeless population is large, the involvement of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
property developers
is required
and recommended. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
does it release the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
from the burden of funding large-sized construction
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
also
fosters the housing industry.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Given
its role in attracting public consumption and accelerating economic development, the housing industry should be at the mercy of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
market
,
rather
than the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
.

Another drawback of state control over the housing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
market
is that it could result in the stagnancy of construction quality, functionality, facilities and other aspects of housing. Apartment blocks or other residential constructions would
be built
in a similar pattern and the cityscape would be monotonous. Excessive uniformity,
especially
in the size and number of rooms, will fail to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
the comprehensive requirements raised by citizens on properties.

Despite these objections,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
intervention is essential in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
segments of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
market
and can render more resistance to citizens. Single parents, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
with disabilities and other disadvantaged
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are among those who are not ready to afford commercial housing. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
can provide them either with a housing allowance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
properties or
directly
with economical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
.

As indicated above, in addressing homelessness and inadequate housing, the joint effort of both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
sector
is required
. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
intervention would impede the property
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
market
and
negatively
influence the supply and demand relationship,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
assistance is essential for low-income families and vulnerable individuals in need of housing.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
18Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
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IELTS essay Only government action can solve housing shortages in big cities. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
328 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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