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One of the most challenge problems in modern society is to have the most up-to-date skills for workplace. For solving this, government decides to give all adults over the age of 25 a training course to learn new skills. Do you think it is an effective way v.1

One of the most challenge problems in modern society is to have the most up-to-date skills for workplace. For solving this, government decides to give all adults over the age of 25 a training course to learn new skills. Do you think it is an effective way v. 1
Incorporating mathematics into the school curriculum has long been part of the traditional educational system. However, some parents argue that mathematics is not a necessary subject, while others still believe that it is. This essay will discuss both of these viewpoints. To some parents, mathematics may appear redundant because its theories and applications only apply to a small group of people who want to specialise in the field of mathematics or other related areas. Apart from simple calculations, for most people, mathematical formulas and theories are rarely used in their daily life. For example, factory workers and artists do not need to know about complex algebra or trigonometry in order to make a living. Mathematics has little impact on one’s emotional and social development as well as success in many occupations. On the other hand, it is considered an important subject which lays the foundation for other relevant subjects in school. Chemistry, biology, physics, and business depend on a lot of mathematical knowledge. Whether or not mathematics is directly applied and utilised later in life, it is undeniably embedded in the development of science and technology. In addition, studying mathematics at school can help students develop critical and analytical thinking which may assist them in solving not only numerical problems but also practical life dilemmas. As they exercise their critical thinking by practicing mathematical questions, their problem solving skills are likely improved. In conclusion, this essay discussed both sides of the debate about whether or not mathematics should be taught at school. It is clear that although mathematical knowledge is part of the foundation of science and other fields, it may not be useful to many people especially when their jobs do not require this knowledge.
Incorporating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
into the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
curriculum has long been part of the traditional educational system.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
parents argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
is not a necessary subject, while others
still
believe that it is. This essay will discuss both of these viewpoints.

To
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
parents,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
may appear redundant
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
its theories and applications
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
apply to a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
group of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who want to
Possible spelling mistake. 'specialise' is British English.
specialise
in the field of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
related areas. Apart from simple calculations, for most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematical
formulas and theories are rarely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in their daily life.
For example
, factory workers and artists do not need to know about complex algebra or trigonometry in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a living.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Mathematics
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
impact on one’s emotional and social development
as well
as success in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
occupations.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, it
is considered
an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
subject which lays the foundation for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
relevant subjects in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. Chemistry, biology, physics, and business depend on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematical
knowledge.
Consider shortening this phrase to just "Whether". It is correct though if you mean 'regardless of whether'.
Whether or not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
is
directly
applied and
Possible spelling mistake. 'utilised' is British English.
utilised
later in life, it is
undeniably
embedded in the development of science and technology.
In addition
, studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
students develop critical and analytical thinking which may assist them in solving not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
numerical problems
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
practical life dilemmas. As they exercise their critical thinking by practicing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematical
questions, their problem solving
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
are likely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
.

In conclusion
, this essay discussed both sides of the debate about
Consider shortening this phrase to just "whether". It is correct though if you mean 'regardless of whether'.
whether or not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
should
be taught
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematical
knowledge is part of the foundation of science and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
fields, it may not be useful to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
especially
when their jobs do not require this knowledge.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay One of the most challenge problems in modern society is to have the most up-to-date skills for workplace. For solving this, government decides to give all adults over the age of 25 a training course to learn new skills. Do you think it is an effective way v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
286 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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