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One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.8

One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages. v. 8
These days, science and technology has been evolving at a higher rate. This has resulted in higher rate of life expectancy ratio to be boomed up in last few years. This advancement has certainly increased the ratio of population from earlier times. Herein, I firmly believe that this development has more of advantages then just demerits. Firstly, the rapid change in science and technology has provided us with the privilege where people can live longer than in the past. As a result this has made, the older generation to stay motivated till they can contribute to one’s country. Nowadays, people at the age of 70 also have some contribution to the overall all enhancement of the economy. For instance professions like a writer, lawmakers, scientists, and many more have a lot to put forth the country's contribution. This not just allows the country to improve, but also helps older generation to stay intact with all the social awareness around. Furthermore, in this modern world grandparents are the only concerned ones for the offspring’s as are the only valid provider for upbringing except parents. They have a greater role to play this way as they will share their own experiences with them to make children vulnerable to the environment around. For an instance, if older people are the best people who can nourish their grandchildren. To conclude, the improved medical care and facilities has made it possible to have longer life expectancy and it is just a myth that they are a burden to the society. I believe that this way they are equal contributors in the enhancement and development of country working towards making a nation standing successful in all spheres.
These days, science and technology has been evolving at a higher rate. This has resulted in higher rate of life expectancy ratio to
be boomed
up in last few years. This advancement has
certainly
increased the ratio of population from earlier times. Herein, I
firmly
believe that this development has more of advantages then
just
demerits.

Firstly
, the rapid
change
in science and technology has provided us with the privilege where
people
can
live
longer than in the past.
As a result
this has made, the older generation to stay motivated till they can contribute to one’s country. Nowadays,
people
at the age of 70
also
have
some
contribution to the
overall
all enhancement of the economy.
For instance
professions like a writer, lawmakers, scientists, and
many
more have a lot to put forth the country's contribution. This not
just
allows
the country to
improve
,
but
also
helps
older generation to stay intact with all the social awareness around.

Furthermore
, in this modern world grandparents are the
only
concerned ones for the offspring’s as are the
only
valid provider for upbringing except parents. They have a greater role to play this way as they will share their
own
experiences with them to
make
children vulnerable to the environment around. For an instance, if older
people
are the best
people
who can nourish their grandchildren.

To conclude
, the
improved
medical care and facilities has made it possible to have longer life expectancy and it is
just
a myth that they are a burden to the society. I believe that this way they are equal contributors in the enhancement and development of country working towards making a nation standing successful in all spheres.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages. v. 8

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
281 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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